


To Boldly Go

by 8daysuntiltheapocalypseiguess



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series, Supernatural
Genre: Canon Compliant, Characters Writing Fanfiction, Crack Treated Seriously, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Metafiction, Multimedia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-17 06:07:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28969566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/8daysuntiltheapocalypseiguess/pseuds/8daysuntiltheapocalypseiguess
Summary: Title: Just One of Those ThingsAuthor: Impala67Series: TOSRating: MSummary: Four years into their five-year mission, and all the planets start to look the same.In which Dean is not Gene Roddenberry, but he does write Star Trek fanfiction.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester
Comments: 556
Kudos: 639





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Happy birthday Dean Winchester!
> 
> Maggie anthonycrowley on tumblr and I threw a lot of ideas back and forth about this concept, so a lot of their influence shows up in this fic.
> 
> This fic is ridiculous. You have been warned.
> 
> In the SPN universe, I’ve decided that ST:TOS is a lot more popular on ffnet, and none of us know enough about in-universe fandom in SPN to dispute it. There’s the nostalgia, but also ffnet is SO horribly formatted I find it so endearing and super fun to try to replicate. I would never post my fic there.
> 
> If you want to read the comments in chronological order, go from bottom to top. (See? Bonkers formatting choice. I love it.) Any names resembling real accounts are unintentional.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Dean transfers all his old fic to ffnet.

Just One of Those Things by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: M, English, J. Kirk, Words: 2k+, Favs: 16, Follows: 2, Published: August 8, 2005

Title: Just One of Those Things

Author: Impala67

Series: TOS

Rating: M

Summary: Four years into their five-year mission, and all the planets start to look the same.

A/N: Originally posted in 1996. I’m moving all my shit because of the shutdown. I was gonna let this one die with the old site with my other K/OC fics, but a couple people asked me to move it so here you go. I was a teenager when I wrote this so sorry the writing’s shit. No disclaimer because I AM Gene Roddenberry (I mean if you’re a cop and reading this you already got me on copyright infringement, what’s a little identity theft while I’m at it). Edit: This is rated Mature so don’t read it if you’re not 18+. I refuse to use fucking fruit labels on my stories.

💬 for Just One of Those Things

Kirklover1230

I was hoping this was just mislabeled Spirk but I’m not even that disappointed. at this point I would honestly read your grocery list

pootpoot

dont know why everyone rags on lemons this is a good story theyre just prudes

Guest

cool story :)

Felicia

I really, really like how you show the way Kirk’s transient lifestyle affects the connections he’s able to make with people. It’s true that Kurani isn’t a fleshed-out character but I feel like that’s kind of the point! Kirk never stays in one place long enough to really get to know any of the people on a more than surface level, and you really conveyed the loneliness and the longing in that.

MetalHead27

I liked this, but just as a note it feels a little ooc. Like I don’t think Kirk is as much of a thoughtless womanizer as you make him here. The alien chick feels more like an object than a character

FusciaRose

I’m so glad you decided to move this one too! It’s sooooooo hot omg!

plutonium

I actually LOVE how you just cut straight to it like good for you you know what you’re about

lionsandtigers

You have GOT to add lemon in your A/N nobody wants to be blindsided by that shit.

Guest

honewstly this kind of feels like you just threw them together with no buildup but whatever it was hot

George Takei

Oh my god Imp I COMPLETELY forgot you used to write boring oc (and honestly ooc SORRY) het fic lol like I’m so glad you recovered

* * *

And Nothing Hurt by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: T, English, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 4k+, Favs: 512, Follows: 399, Published: August 12, 2005

Title: And Nothing Hurt

Author: Impala67

Series: TOS

Rating: T

Summary: Jim is injured. Spock tends to his wounds.

A/N: Originally posted in 1997. I’d just gotten into Vonnegut at the time, so you know what to blame that title on. Good thing I’m Gene Roddenberry and therefore don’t need a disclaimer (identity theft is a lifestyle).

  
💬 for And Nothing Hurt 

BottomsUpBiotch

Oh my god when you realize that this was all happening in his head... you’re sooo evil

George Takei

Imp is a MAN like god please READ the bio I PROMISE it’s not gonna hurt you vvvv

Guest

Giiiiirl this is so GOOD omg!

Dreamweaver98

Oh my god the way you just left him in the cell except he’s alone and the creature is advancing on him... I want Spock to come rescue him, but the way Jim’s feeling of peace slowly deteriorates into confusion then disappointment and then loneliness and finally terror is so well done. Also, a+ for creating a truly creepy alien race. You’re so creative and the description is so good, I literally felt a shiver down my spine. Now excuse me I’m gonna go read 18k of fluff.

Not a Doctor

This is the POLAR OPPOSITE of hurt/comfort what the FUCK. And why does it work so well?

FionaMartindale

I hate this I hate this I hate this (jk I looooove it). Spock in Kirk’s hallucination is so gentle and tender I wish it was real SO BAD!

George Takei

I love it when you rip my heart out Imp you are the only man I would ever willingly allow to hurt me. It just hurts SO GOOD

Kirklover1230

IMP! This is the first fic of yours I read and I still love it just as much.

458 <<Prev Page 1 .. 27 28 29 30  ** 31 **

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O Brother, Where Art Thou? by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: T, English, J. Kirk, K. Riley, Words: 35k+, Favs: 871, Follows: 737, Published: August 15, 2005, Updated: August 19, 2005

Title: O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Author: Impala67

Series: TOS

Rating: T

Summary: Jim’s been hungry before, but never like this.

A/N: Originally posted in 2002. I literally just ripped off the title off of the most recent movie I’d seen. But hey, it fit. I’m Gene Roddenberry and I invented Star Trek, so I don’t need a disclaimer (identity theft has gotten me this far and no one’s arrested me yet). This fic is rated T, but it gets pretty heavy. Maybe skip it if you’re sensitive about food issues and death and like. Genocide.

💬 for O Brother, Where Art Thou?

MarkusAurelius

Your Tarsus IV fics are my FAVORITES

George Takei

YES I am rereading this fic yet again NO I don’t want to talk about it

2BabyBlues

Oh my GOD he doesn’t see Kevin again until he joins Starfleet I’m so sadddddd. But that reunion scene might be the most moving scene I’ve ever read. Jim didn’t fail him! And now they get to be together again on the same ship I’m crying

2BabyBlues

No, Kevin!!! Come back!!! Jim literally loves you like a brother and would die for you! Jim should have told him his mother was dead, but Jim was just trying so hard to protect him, to keep his hope alive, and now he’s out searching for someone he’ll never find...

2BabyBlues

I love Jim so much. He’s just a kid himself, but he takes such good care of Kevin, even when Kevin pushes back against him. It’s so cool how you start to slowly realize that the “brother” in the title refers to both Sam, who Jim is wishing would save him, and Kevin, who Jim is trying to save.

heart2heart2heart

OH MY GODDDDD

2BabyBlues

God, the way Jim keeps wishing Sam was there with him, and wondering if Sam or his parents even know what’s happening, and if he’ll ever see them again... it breaks my heart.

2BabyBlues

It was so interesting to make Jim’s time on Tarsus IV a punishment for stealing food while his parents were away on a mission—especially as like foreshadowing of the famine on Tarsus. I don’t really see many people giving Jim and Sam the army brat treatment, but you definitely have to consider that as a possibility, since their dad was in the Fleet and we never see any kids on the ships. The complex relationship you hint at between Jim and his dad is definitely interesting.

Four Blind Mice

This fic PHYSICALLY HURT ME, you owe me financial compensation!

FaithlessBeliever

Oh my god when Kevin leaves the group! And then Jim thinks he’s dead and it’s his fault oh my god you’re evil!

I Love Q

What the heck was he supposed to do CaliforniaSon??? He was 12!!!! Kodos was literally the only adult around, and he was manipulating and abusing them and lying to them and getting Jim so twisted around he couldn’t even tell what was and wasn’t true anymore. Did you even read the fic?

CaliforniaSon

I’m sorry but the way that Jim was just willing to go along with Kodos as long as it kept him and Kevin safe when he KNEW what Kodos had done is bullshit

flyfrenchfryfly

This fic is so so so so good. Amazing. Brilliant.

FreeMeFromMyself

I really love this fic. It hits like a punch to the gut, but the ending is so soft and hopeful.

Guest

This was different from any other Tarsus IV fic I’ve ever read, in all the best ways.

801 Page  ** 1 ** 2 3 4 11 .. Last Next>>

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Swelter by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: M, English, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 3k+, Favs: 350, Follows: 306, Published: August 20, 2005

Title: Swelter

Author: Impala67

Series: TOS

Rating: M

Summary: Vulcan in the summer is hotter than hell.

A/N: Originally posted in 2003. My original A/N: “Literally just porn. Happy birthday to me.” Once again, I, Gene Roddenberry, approve of this story. If you’re not 18+, don’t read. I’m serious. Go be a kid.

💬 for Swelter

NiftyTrick

Whyyyy is there a girl in this. Put a warning in the A/N or something.

PollyPink

This is disgusting. Thanks.

Guest

If this stays up it’ll be a miracle. A true miracle. Literally God shining down upon us all

Guest

Fans self

George Takei

This is SO FUCKING DIRTY, oh my god, I forgot how FUCKING dirty this story was, if anyone reports you I’ll kill them 

220 <<Prev Page 1 .. 11 12 13 14  ** 15 **

* * *

  
Five Times Sam Left and One Time He Stayed by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: K+, English, J. Kirk, G. S. Kirk, Words: 7k+, Favs: 203, Follows: 121, Published: August 23, 2005

Title: Five Times Sam Left and One Time He Stayed

Author: Impala67

Series: TOS

Rating: K

Summary: Exactly as advertised.

A/N: Originally posted in 2003. Who says titles have to be creative. Anyway, if you don’t know me, I’m Gene Roddenberry, creator of Star Trek, and this is my sandbox that I generously allow you all to play in.

💬 for Five Times Sam Left and One Time He Stayed

Kirklover1230

This is so, so, so well-written. While you know I love all your fics and I’m usually a K/S hoe, the way you write sibling relationships with all their messiness is so deeply felt and emotionally true. I just can’t handle it!

PeanutBusterParfait

This is really good! Sad and funny and heartfelt by turns. They’re such siblings!

George Takei

Every time I see your non-disclaimer I think about that person who was like “you should put a disclaimer at the top saying you don’t own the characters” and you were like “why the hell would I need to do that?” And they were like “are YOU Gene Roddenberry?” And you were like “YEP. And I’ll sue you for stealing my characters if you don’t leave me the fuck alone.” That was sooooo funny and I’m honored to know I was there for the start of such an iconic fixture in this fandom

Anyway you know how I feel about this fic because I left that monster review on it. I would repost it on here if I didn’t KNOW that you printed it out and keep it tucked in your nightstand so you can take it out lovingly and read it every night. I know that’s what I do with this fic <3

Guest

I enjoyed reading this! Thanks for writing :)

192 <<Prev Page 1 .. 9 10 11 12  ** 13 **

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Make Your Mind Up by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: M, English, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 54k+, Favs: 1k+, Follows: 1k+, Published: September 13, 2005, Updated: November 9, 2006

Title: Make Your Mind Up

Author: Impala67

Series: TOS

Rating: Hard M

Summary: Jim’s entire family went to Tarsus IV when he was twelve. They didn’t all make it back. When his father discovered that Kodos was alive, the Fleet agreed to let him organize a search for the man who killed his wife. However, when nearly five years have passed without result, the Fleet abandons the hunt. Jim’s father doesn’t. With their father jobless and on the trail of a genocidal maniac, Sam leaves, and Jim is left to fend for himself the only way he can.

A/N: First fic at the new digs. Obligatory reminder that I AM Gene Roddenberry and I own these characters. Warning for prostitution, but it’s not explicit. The entire M on this one comes from K/S. If you’re not 18+ please, please don’t read.

💬 for Make Your Mind Up

Guest

how well you write hooker fic makes me seriously concerned for you lolol

GetShorty

I can’t believe you wrote THE definitive Tarsus IV fic and THE definitive hooker!fic you just keep on giving the people exactly what they want don’t you? Mwah!

flight of fancy

I AM DEAD. THIS FIC KILLED ME AND NOW I AM DEAD.

ForestFire555

This is SO delicately handled, I was honestly shocked in a pleasant way when I realized you’re a man. Like I know men can be sex workers too, obviously, but this is usually a topic dudes won’t touch with a ten-foot pole, at least not when it isn’t Julia Roberts in the leading role. And you not only dove in anyway, you did so expertly. Bravo.

BeeHiveHairdo

Not only is this the best hooker!fic in this fandom, it might be the best hooker!fic I’ve ever READ. It might be the best FIC I’ve ever read. Wowowow.

Guest

This fic made me uncomfortable. I’m pretty sure it was supposed to. I’m never reading it again, but I will be thinking about it for a long time I think

buckwild 

HOW DO YOU DO IT? God, every fic is a slam dunk.

Kirklover1230

You know how I feel about this fic Imp but I am here to tell you again. AHHHHHHH. That’s it. That’s the comment.

Frank N Furter

This is my new fave fic of all time.

YorkieMomma

I am so glad that you gave this such a hopeful ending. I know people who have been in the sex work industry, both by choice and... not... and a lot of times, getting pushed into that can really fuck you up. I think it’s great to send the message that it can and does get better, and that people’s work in that industry doesn’t define them or their whole lives.

GuitarHero

Do you write professionally? Cuz you should write professionally. The scene in the bathroom FUCKED ME UP. This made me feel so much, and now that I’m done I feel like a wrung-out sponge

George Takei

OH MY GOD YOU FINISHED IT!!!! PM me bitch I want to gas you upppp

Candy483

i KNOW there’s like a ~deeper message~ here but like. OH MY GOD is this hot. jesus

acaseofyou

Oh my goodness gracious. I will hold this fic in my heart forever. Thank you thank you THANK YOU for writing this! I laughed, I cried, I screamed into my pillow. I embarrassed myself at work. I wore a groove into my carpet rolling anxiously back and forth in my rolly chair. I know I’ll keep coming back to this fic again and again just to chase those feelings. This is an example of the very best of what fanfiction can be. The definition of a transformative work. Because it transformed me and the way o think about the world.

acaseofyou

Sooo excited for the next (last!!!!!) chapter!

1,002 <<Prev Page 1 .. 30  ** 31  ** 32 33 34 41 .. Last Next>>

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S. Dean was PISSED when people first started calling him Imp but eventually he got over himself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean creates his author profile, talks to some people, updates his author profile, favorites some fics, and talks to people some more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am doing all of you a great service by not subjecting you to the hideous green and orange color scheme of ffnet PMs. This chapter is longer and includes various PM conversations, as well as different sections of Dean’s ffn author page.
> 
> Once again, any similarities to real fics or authors are incidental.

Impala67 PM

My Stories . Bio Fav: Stories . Authors

Biography

Joined August 5, 2005

Don’t call me Imp unless you know me. I have never written Sailor Moon fic. That was someone else. Seriously, stop asking me about Sailor Moon.

Yes I AM a man and I DO write fanfiction if you have a problem with that how about you go get yourself laid and stop worrying about me.

I don’t have a computer so if you PM me and I don’t respond right away it’s probably because I don’t have web access. Or you’re being fucking rude or annoying. If you bug me about updates that’s both.

Private Messaging (PM)

Suggestion

🎇 George Takei

I think you should use a “fucking fruit” label on your bio

👤 Impala67

Fuck you

🎇 George Takei

Sorry bb I’m lesbo

Private Messaging (PM)

SO ANNOYING

🎇 George Takei

All those people whining about your threesome fic... Jesus why do people hate women? Tho I’m glad to see you’ve finally recovered from your blow-up-sex-doll fem OC illness

👤 Impala67 

I was NOT that bad

🎇 George Takei 

Dude I was THERE

Private Messaging (PM)

Fic

👤 Impala67 

You know I don’t like to be all effusive and shit but damn that fic... are you sure you’re a lesbian

🎇 George Takei 

Shut your heathen mouth you know Uhura’s my one and only. Jesus, write one slash fic and suddenly everyone thinks you’re straight...

🎇 George Takei

Also why can’t you just comment like a normal person

👤 Impala67 

I did

🎇 George Takei 

Yeah you said “nice”

👤 Impala67 

You can’t respond to my comments

🎇 George Takei 

Awww Imp do you miss me when I’m not around?

Private Messaging (PM)

As Requested

👤 Impala67 

Tank’s full.

🎇 George Takei 

Oh COME ON friends let friends gas each other up. It’s not for you, it’s for me.

👤 Impala67 

Yeah, right.

🎇 George Takei 

Seriously man! It’s called reciprocity.

👤 Impala67 

Pretty sure it’s not.

🎇 George Takei 

It is!!! You “don’t like to be effusive” my ass your first ever review of my fic was actually embarrassing to read dude, so now I’m legally obligated to return the favor. In all seriousness, though, this had to have been tough to write. I mean, that bathroom scene was tough to READ.

👤 Impala67

Idk why everyone is obsessed with the bathroom scene. I don’t even know why people call it “the bathroom scene”, it’s a hooking fic half the fucking fic happens in bathrooms

🎇 George Takei

Ummmmm......okay, there’s no way you don’t know why people are fixating on that one dude. It literally made me cry! Like I cried MULTIPLE TIMES reading this! And I didn’t cry when I broke my leg in the seventh grade!

👤 Impala67 

Congrats

🎇 George Takei 

Smartass. I’m just saying, there’s no way that was UNINTENTIONAL. I mean, this has so much heart and fucking PATHOS, okay, like real English Literature shit, which means you put a little part of yourself in here

Anyway this fic is SO well-written, and you KNOW I love O Brother but this might be my new favorite of yours. Idk idk. Still love OB, feels kind of sacrilegious to put anything above it

👤 Impala67

Thanks Georgie

🎇 George Takei

Shut up you deserve it. Just to let you know I’m gonna come back after I fully process the whole thing and leave a five paragraph essay in your reviews. RECIPROCITY

Impala67 PM

My Stories . Bio Fav: Stories . Authors

Biography

Joined August 5, 2005

Don’t call me Imp unless you know me. I have never written Sailor Moon fic. That was someone else. Seriously, stop asking me about Sailor Moon.

Yes I AM a man and I DO write fanfiction if you have a problem with that how about you go get yourself laid and stop worrying about me.

I don’t have a computer so if you PM me and I don’t respond right away it’s probably because I don’t have web access. Or you’re being fucking rude or annoying. If you bug me about updates that’s both.

Update 2007: DON’T propose marriage to me who the hell reads a hooking fic and then sends a marriage proposal???

Private Messaging (PM)

Question

🎇 George Takei

Marry me

👤 Impala67

Okay

👤 Impala67 

I’d be the best beard ever (you thought I was just gonna say “fuck off Georgie,” huh? Never underestimate your opponent. Your move.)

🎇 George Takei

Oh I love straight chicken. Sadly you can’t wear white to our wedding you slut

👤 Impala67

Just means I know how to treat a girl right. You can sit on my face backwards and pretend I’m a chick.

🎇 George Takei

OH MY GOD I YIELD! You’re fucking disgusting bro I respect that

Private Messaging (PM)

Beta

🎇 George Takei 

Hey do you have time to do a quick read-through of this fic I’m writing? Just for technical stuff, nothing huge. Also there’s this bit of dialogue that’s bugging me...

👤 Impala67 

How long?

🎇 George Takei 

3k

👤 Impala67 

Yeah shoot it to me

🎇 George Takei 

ty!!!

Private Messaging (PM)

Hi

🕸 NotoriousBFG

Hey there fellow fandom dude!

👤 Impala67 

Do I know you?

🕸 NotoriousBFG

No but I’ve reviewed like every one of your fics.

👤 Impala67 

Oh. Hey, thanks, man

🕸 NotoriousBFG

They’re all pretty much amazing. Got any advice for a new author?

👤 Impala67 

Write what you know.

🕸 NotoriousBFG

Haha, don’t practice what you preach, huh?

👤 NotoriousBFG

Yeah. Lol

Private Messaging (PM)

Ahhhh!

🎇 George Takei 

Oh my god this fic!!!! Shit!!! HOW are all your fics absolute BANGERS

👤 Impala67 

I have no idea

Private Messaging (PM)

Happy New Year!

🎇 George Takei 

HAPPY 2008 BITCH!!!

👤 Impala67 

For you maybe

🎇 George Takei 

Wow late AND grumpy

👤 Impala67 

Sorry my Christmas just kind of sucked

Private Messaging (PM)

Don’t make fun of me I’m worried

🎇 George Takei 

Hey, everything okay? I mean, you’ve had fic dry spells before, but this is the longest we’ve gone without contact in a while. I mean you’re probably just taking a step back, but I worry about you man! Especially when the message you left on was that your Christmas sucked... anyway I hope everything’s going okay for you

Private Messaging (PM)

You’re back!!!

🌌 Kirklover1230

Hiii Imp I’m SO glad you’re not dead

👤 Impala67

Um, thanks Marisol?

🌌 Kirklover1230

You were gone for a literal year! Welcome back tho :)

Private Messaging (PM)

Hi!

🎇 George Takei 

Omg I was SO glad to see you drop that fic! I thought you were dead or something

👤 Impala67 

I was

🎇 George Takei 

There’s that quick wit I was missing. I missed you!!!

👤 Impala67

Yeah me too. Things went to hell for a little while there. I mean it’s still kind of shit but it’s like. Out of the fire and back into the frying pan.

🎇 George Takei 

Ugh sorry I hope things look up. In the meantime you have a lot of good fic to catch up on to take your mind off it!

👤 Impala67 

Yeah. Anyway that was just a little drabble I have something a lot bigger in the works

🎇 George Takei 

Oh man I’m STOKED

👤 Impala67 

Sorry I didn’t respond to your last PM

🎇 George Takei 

Lol it’s fiiiine

Impala67 PM

My Stories . Bio Fav: Stories . Authors

Favorite Stories 13

My Name is Freedom >> by George Takei “My little shooting star,” her grandmother used to call her.  Nyota ya risasi.  Something bright and fast and elemental, unable to be contained. Nyota loved her family, but they always knew that one day she was going to leave them. 

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, chapters: 3, words: 11k+, favs: 873, follows: 732, February 17, 2009, Uhura

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To Memory Now by laminator Post-Voyage Home fic. There are many things that Spock forgets. When Jim reaches for him, he doesn’t reach back.

Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, T, English, words: 10k+, favs: 908, follows: 867, March 6, 2008, Spock, J. Kirk

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Forever’s End >> by FallingWater Episode-specific City on the Edge of Forever AU. With Edith’s death, history is restored, but Jim is left devastated. To make matters worse, he, Spock, and Bones are all trapped in 1930. As time passes, their hopes of a return to their own era slowly start to wane. In a time of great suffering, Jim and Spock learn to live.

StarTrek: The Original Series, M, English, chapters: 15, words: 84k+, favs: 1k+, follows: 2k+, updated: April 8, 2009 published: February 18, 2007, Spock, J. Kirk

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An Acceptable Alternative by George Takei Mirror, Mirror missing scene. It seems that James Kirk’s counterpart’s predilections are just as wild and contrary as everything else about him. When one cannot have what one wants, it is logical to take that which is offered.

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, words: 6k+, favs: 1k+, follows: 818, February 13, 2007, J. Kirk, Spock

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Gimme Some Action by SetPhasers2Stun Coda to A Piece of the Action. Jim and Spock keep the suits.

StarTrek: The Original Series, M, English, words: 5k+, favs: 1k+, follows: 933, January 4, 2007, Spock, J. Kirk

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The Other Side of Paradise >> by Kirklover1230 Canon AU. Spans from This Side of Paradise to Amok Time. Jim accompanies Spock to the field. Instead of falling for Kalomi, they fall for each other. When the spores wear off, Spock comes to the realization that his feelings for Jim weren’t manufactured after all. The fact that Jim’s feelings were is cemented in his mind when they get stuck in 1930 and Jim falls in love with Edith Keeler.

StarTrek: The Original Series, M, English, chapters: 21, words: 91k+, favs: 2k+, follows: 3k+, updated: December 11, 2009 published: June 1, 2006, Spock, J. Kirk

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King Me by TeaWithHoney Gen. Sam teaches Jim to play Fizzbin. Years later, it just might save his life.

StarTrek: The Original Series, K+, English, words: 2k+, favs: 89, follows: 60, March 12, 2006, J. Kirk, G. S. Kirk

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A Feeling of Unnameable Dread by SpeakSoftly While facilitating negotiations on a planet renowned for its entertainment, the Enterprise crew is dropped directly into a production of the Rocky Horror Picture Show that redefines the meaning of audience participation. Ensemble fic, established K/S

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, words: 8k+, favs: 570, follows: 504, January 23, 2006

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Set Sail on a Sea of Stars >> by Futurama When the crew of the late USS Enterprise is asked whether they want to return to Earth to face the consequences of their actions after rescuing Spock, the vote goes a different way. Space pirates au.

Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, M, English, chapters: 12, words: 38k+, favs: 1k+, follows: 1k+, updated: January 9, 2006, published: August 28, 2005, J. Kirk, Spock

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The Only John Wayne Left in This Town >> by ArchdukeFranzFerdinand A Piece of the Action AU. There was no book left on Sigma Iotia II. Instead, it was a vid. Or rather, a series of vids. And rather than Chicago of the 20s, the crew finds themselves in an approximation of Deadwood South Dakota in the 1870s. Ensemble with K/S pre-slash

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, chapters: 10, words: 31k+, favs: 1k+, follows: 1k+, updated: December 3, 2005, published: March 12, 2005

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Memoratum by Hell4Leather After the events of Wrath of Khan, Jim mourns. But if Spock is dead, then why can Jim still feel him in his head?

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, K+, English, words: 7k+, favs: 993, follows: 751, October 5, 2004, J. Kirk, Spock

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Spiritual by George Takei Before there was Romulan and Klingon; before there was Vulcan; before there was Federation Standard and English, and even before there was Swahili; there was always music. She has always harbored the secret belief that song is the outward expression of the soul. Or: Uhura and music through the years.

StarTrek: The Original Series, K+, English, words: 8k+, favs: 804, follows: 739, July 30, 2004, Uhura

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Spock Does Not Like Italian by TriedAndTrue Spock doesn’t accompany Jim and Doctor Taylor to dinner. Years later, after she calls on the captain once again, she finds out why.

Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, K+, English, words: 5k+, favs: 796, follows: 712, December 20, 2004, J. Kirk, Spock

Private Messaging (PM)

Fic

👤 Impala67 

I fucking love your most recent fic you know I’m a slut for Uhura

🎇 George Takei 

I know this, and it’s the only reason I respect you

🎇 George Takei 

Also dude all my fics are about Uhura. Uhura fics are my Thing

👤 Impala67 

Yeah and they all rock. Like all your stories prove that you Know Shit about Kenya, and I’ve never been out of the US, so that’s something where I could never get the right feeling across

🎇 George Takei 

Yeah but I feel like you NAIL the feeling of being like both trapped and free in the Midwest in a way no one else does and I could never do, so

👤 Impala67 

Yeah, feeling more trapped than free these days. Lol. I guess it’s a different kind of freedom. Like, I think Kirk just always knew he was going to join the Fleet because he was supposed to. And he loves it, but like. It wasn’t a choice for him, as much. Not like for Uhura.

🎇 George Takei 

Damn this one hit you hard, huh?

👤 Impala67 

Idk. It reminded me of Sam.

🎇 George Takei 

Oh my god why are you so obsessed with a character who showed up in literally one episode. 

🎇 George Takei 

Although if you weren’t I guess we’d have missed out on like three of your best fics

Private Messaging (PM)

ST 2009

🎇 George Takei 

Ohhhh my god everyone on LiveJournal is ragging on the new movie and I’ve come here to give you some of the highlights omg

“Oh my god TPTB read hooker fic!”

“This movie WANTS what hooker!fic’s got”

“Why would you pay ten dollars to see this movie when you can read hookerfic for free”

“Impala67 may be entitled to financial compensation”

“Wow this movie is literally just like shitty off-brand Make Your Mind Up except it’s not even hot.”

Oh my god Imp your INFLUENCE

👤 Impala67 

I literally just write fanfiction on the internet

👤 Impala67 

I miss when it was just you and me and Lib screaming at each other on geocities

👤 Impala67 

If anyone brings my fucking hooking fic up to the actors I’m deleting my account

👤 Impala67 

Also is there a stream link my brother won’t let me torrent from his laptop anymore

🎇 George Takei 

Face it baby you’re a star 

(oh my god I miss Libbbbb)

🎇 George Takei 

http://www.megavideo.com/...

🎇 George Takei 

Also don’t even lie you stopped writing K/FOC porn and started writing K/S cause your old fics werent getting any reviews. Although you kept up the shitty characterization for a while like some of your early K/S stuff was soooo alpha male-y I had to read it in 100-word chunks so I didn’t overdose on testosterone. It was like, in every fic Kirk had to try to say no homo around the dick in his mouth or he wasn’t a real man

👤 Impala67 

FUUUUUCK OFF

🎇 George Takei 

I’m serious when you dropped o brother where art thou I was like oh, so dude can like, Actually Write Kirk

🎇 George Takei 

Without turning him into what mainstream America wishes he was. Actually honestly the new movie is like MYMU if you’d never outgrown that shit

👤 Impala67 

Thanks for the link. Could have left the smartass comments tho

🎇 George Takei 

Yw :)))) can’t let your fame get to your head

👤 Impala67 

I never fucking wanted to be famous I’m literally just a guy

🎇 George Takei 

Oh you poor baby, it must be sooooo hard, everyone loving your fic lol

👤 Impala67 

Hey, you’re not exactly a no-name yourself

🎇 George Takei 

Yeah the difference is that I know I deserve it. You deserve it too. Like I PROMISE. I have never pretended to like your shitty K/FOC fic you KNOW I wouldn’t gas you up for nothing dude

👤 Impala67 

Wow thanks

🎇 George Takei 

Oh come on, everyone’s fic was shitty when they were seventeen

👤 George Takei 

Not yours

🎇 George Takei 

That’s because I’m a fic goddess. You were my first stan :’) Crazy to think if I had regular shitty 17-year-old fic we never would have even become friends

Private Messaging (PM)

Request

👤 KeepOnTrekkin

Hi, some of us are trying to put together a queer retrospective on early online Star Trek fandom, and we were wondering if you might be interested in contributing?

👤 Impala67 

Idk if that’s really for me...

👤 KeepOnTrekkin

Okay, that’s cool. But it would mean a lot to a lot of people who have liked your work. No pressure, just something to think about

👤 Impala67 

No I mean like isn’t it kind of idk goache or whatever to have a straight guy in there?

👤 KeepOnTrekkin

Oh you’re straight? 

👤 Impala67 

Yeah...

👤 KeepOnTrekkin

Sorry, it’s just that I was talking to George Takei (username, not the real guy lol) who’s doing it and I know you guys are friends, and she said she honestly wasn’t sure if you’d want to, but the only thing she mentioned was that you’re a pretty private person

👤 Impala67 

Yeah a lot of people on here just assume I’m gay or bi or whatever and it’s just easier not to correct them. And it’s like, I’m not homophobic so it really doesn’t bother me

👤 KeepOnTrekkin

Okay well thanks for your time!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dean’s like “I’m str8” and KeepOnTrekkin is like *monkey looks, monkey looks away*
> 
> Okay, informal poll: DID Dean write Sailor Moon fic or was it really “someone else?” (PLEASE engage in discourse about my meta fic it’ll be sooo funny)
> 
> Also, you know half the reason Dean actually read the Carver Edlund books was to make sure Chuck never mentioned his fanfiction


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Dean isn’t working a case and can’t sleep, he writes. He spends a lot of sleepless nights in Lisa’s house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 serves as a kind of overlay for chapter 1 and the beginning of this chapter. This one picks up pretty much where 1 left off, continuing the first chapter’s exclusive focus on Dean’s fic. Once again, any resemblance to real fics or usernames is unintentional.

What Is and What Can Never Be by Impala67

📜 Movies >> Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan Rated: M, English, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 22k+, Favs: 1k+, Follows: 984, Published: December 29, 2006, Updated: October 8, 2007

Title: What Is and What Can Never Be

Author: Impala67

Movie: Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

Rating: M

Summary: Jim wakes up next to Spock. He makes breakfast in the replicator and watches the stars streak past. He goes to the bridge and gives commands and looks at his crew standing all around him. He is happy.

A/N: This happens between Wrath of Khan and Search for Spock, so it could have been in either category, but Khan is better so that’s where it’s going. It’s not canon compliant with III, but it doesn’t contradict IV at all (because my dad raised me to be fucking respectful). I’m Gene Roddenberry, I own these characters, I do what I want. This one doesn’t have any warnings besides the usual suspects for the M rating, it’s just fucking depressing. Kids don’t read, etc.

💬 for What Is and What Can Never Be

Kirklover1230

As always, this is fantastic! All your fics are so REAL, even though the premise is always totally wild. It really does give me the same feeling of wonder and at the same time emotional/psychological groundedness that TOS does. I don’t know how you capture that so well, but every time I’m amazed all over again!

BlueFootedBooby

I can’t BELIEVE you are literally retconning ST3 you absolute icon

Guest

You can’t top hooker fic but you sure do try. Lucky for us

Dreamweaver98

I absolutely loved this! It actually reminds me of your earlier fic And Nothing Hurt, because it has the same two things that I loved about that one: interesting aliens and false perceptions (the little details like the blue glow that begins to cast doubt on “reality”...) that lead to a slow disillusionment that the reader feels just as much as Jim does. It really draws you into the story and makes it seem real. (Also I have to admit I’m a sucker for the ambiguous endings.)

I love how creative and original the alien race you invented is, how they’ve evolved out of ever feeling happiness, so they actually have an understandable reason to trap you in your head, living out everything you ever wanted—so they can watch and experience the happiness you feel vicariously. And of course the thing Jim wants most is for Spock and his brother to both be alive!

GwendolynBooks

Oh my GOD this is so good!!! The gap between 2 and 3 was really the perfect place to situate this. Both because it makes sense and because it lessens the sting of Jim having to come out of the dream. The only thing that makes it better is knowing that Spock’s not really dead, and they’ll be together again soon enough!

Sateen

Another instant classic

George Takei

Yes you finished it, I’m so pumped!!!! You’re always like “yeah I don’t use a beta you’ll just have to deal with my shitty writing straight no chaser” *proceeds to write one of the best fics in the fandom* like it’s good to see a god stay humble

Anyway! This was very good and also I hate you. Why must you depress me like this. I PMed you by the way. It’s just some incoherent yelling. It’ll probably be a few days before I can give you a proper review but when I do you better watch out

2ErrIsHuman

Omg what a cliffhanger! If I have to wait for the last chapter I might actually combust.

CrackABottle

You’re evil for that cliffhanger dude...

Bee23

Oh my god the SUSPENSE is KILLING meeeee!

TangoFoxtrot

This fic is really good so far, I’m excited to see how it ends. Thanks for sharing!

Guest

What kind of drugs did you take to write this? And where can I find some?

batarang

Dude you really need to learn how to write Good Aliens that aren’t Vulcans. Like not good as in well-thought-out but like morally good. Damn

NotoriousBFG 

Nice work man! This chapter just about knocked my socks off!

My O My

This is so SAD omg! I thought after make your mind up I’d cried all the tears I had over your fic but clearly I was WRONG! Poor Jim...

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A Simple Misunderstanding by Impala67

📜 Movies >> Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home Rated: K+, English, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 5k+, Favs: 748, Follows: 683, Published: October 16, 2008

Title: A Simple Misunderstanding 

Author: Impala67

Movie: Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home

Rating: K+

Summary: After Spock takes a dip in the whale tank, Doctor Taylor calls the cops. Nobody believes they’re trying to save the world.

A/N: I wrote this fic earlier this year but never got around to posting it. It’s a missing scene from Voyage Home, aka the best Trek movie. This is definitively true because I’m Gene Roddenberry and I invented these characters, so what I say goes. Obviously, no disclaimer needed.

💬 for A Simple Misunderstanding 

Kirklover1230

YOU’RE BACK!!!! I’m so happy to see a new fic from you! This is awesome and so funny. I mean, you’re not even rusty! If anything, a year off just made you sharper. The comedic timing is spot on.

MonsterMash

Oh my god this is hilarious!

KlingonWarbird

You’re right IV is the best of the motion pictures! Love this.

NotoriousBFG 

This might be the funniest fic you’ve written yet!

Guest

you can really tell you’ve been to jail before

George Takei 

I’m so happy to see you posting again!! Oh my god Adamson is suuuuuch a good OC! This whole fic is hilarious, but how they get him to finally believe them—priceless!

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From Perdition by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: M, English, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 59k+, Favs: 2k+, Follows: 2k+, Published: November 24, 2008, Updated: May 2, 2010

Title: From Perdition

Author: Impala67

Series: TOS

Rating: M

Summary: Jim Kirk became an astronaut because he wanted to get out of Iowa. His father wanted him to join the Navy like he had, but Jim wants wonder and surprise, not terror and boredom and blood on his hands. After taking part in an experimental test flight of a brand-new technology, his crew’s first task will be to seek out the remnants of the spaceship Alliance, Earth’s first failed mission outside the Solar System.

On an Earth where World War III never happened, Zefram Cochran never invented the warp drive, and the United Federation of Planets never came into being, a Vulcan ambassador is sent to make contact with the first man to command a spaceship that exceeded light speed. Spock, following in his father’s footsteps, has been assigned to the task. As the child of a member of the lost ship’s rescued crew, he is considered the ideal candidate for human interaction.

A/N: Not really sure where this one’s going yet or how long it will be. If how long the summary is gives an idea for the fic, I’d say it’s shaping up to be a monster. Since I’m Gene Roddenberry and these are my characters, I don’t need to disclaim them. This fic is rated M, so kids, turn back now.

💬 for From Perdition

MonaLisa89

Oh my god pleeeeeeease update!!!

Kirklover1230

You know I love ALL your fics and am so happy with all the great content you’re putting out but oh my god I want to read more of this so bad...

NineInTheAfternoon

I feel like this is going to be one of those fandom-defining works

Guest

I just now found this fic (how????) and it is AWESOME! I love how the characters are still so clearly themselves even though you shook things up in such a big way. Well done!

BikerChic

I actually can’t BELIEVE no one has thought of this premise before... it’s literally perfect!

gayflamingo

PLEASE tell me you are going to finish this

Four Blind Mice

Oh my god this is the best ST fic on this website and it’s not even FINISHED! My theory is that TPTB won’t let you finish it because this fic completed would be too powerful

Guest

Whyyyyyyyyyyyy?

acaseofyou 

I know a lot of people have been bugging you about continuing this, but what you have already written is so, so good, and I’m so glad you shared this with us. Even if it never gets finished, reading it has been such a joy. Thank you so much for sharing this with us.

Guest

I just caught up with this entire fic in one day it is SO GOOD!!! Sleep? Who needs it

GuessWho

Really hope you’re planning to finish this

misamigos

This is such a good idea and creative concept!

Paulina

HOW do you get Spock’s voice so perfect? I can literally hear him saying every piece of dialogue in my head so clearly!

Frindle180

*banging on the table* UPDATE, UPDATE, UPDATE

megalomaniac

This is great so far, can’t wait to read more!

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💬 for From Perdition

Guest

THAT ENTRANCE omg iconic!

flubber45

LOL Spock’s reaction when Jim shakes his hand like imagine meeting a guy from another planet and him immediately being like “I’m dtf.” Power move. And like, Jim doesn’t know he’s making it but Spock sure thinks he is! Soooo funny

PinUpPirate

I looooove how Jim is LITERALLY an astronaut and he’s STILL like “... sounds fake” when Spock claims to be from outer space. But I get it! Because if there is life out there, why would it be interested in humans at all, let alone one specific human who doesn’t think of himself as anything particularly special?

Guest

Way to start with a bang! Will definitely be keeping my eye on this one

acaseofyou

Every fic you post reminds me why you’re such a big name in this fandom. A lot of times these big high concept fics have shitty writing, but you can tell these huge, sprawling stories without compromising even a little bit on quality, which is so rare and so special. Everything you write is a treat to read! I can’t wait for you to take us on this journey!

PrettyInPunk

Great first chapter! Can’t wait for more :)

Guest

“Your friend is not dead, merely unconscious.” roflmaoooo

George Takei

Imp ooooooomg this!! Such a good start! There’s this immediate draw between them that really pulls you right in. You told me you had something big in the works and as usual you don’t disappoint! I can already tell this is gonna be a wild ride I’m so ready

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Slide Through My Hands by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: T, English, J. Kirk, P. Kirk, Words: 28k+, Favs: 961, Follows: 905, Published: May 29, 2010, Updated: January 21, 2011

Title: Slide Through My Hands

Author: Impala67 

Series: TOS

Rating: T

Summary: Following Sam’s death, Jim makes the difficult decision to leave Starfleet and bring Peter to live with him on Earth.

A/N: There’s a lot of K/S pining in here, but not a whole lot of actual K/S, so sorry if that’s what you’re here for. If you like to see grown men struggling to interact with the preteens they’re responsible for, this is the fic for you. If that sounds worse than a hot iron to the nail beds, better back-button out of here. Blah blah I’m Gene Roddenberry blah, insert funny continuation of the bit here.

💬 for Slide Through My Hands

JamesTiberius

I’m so happy to see you finished this! Really good from beginning to end

Guest

I’m so sad it’s over. The ending was bittersweet, but I think it had to be. Plus it matches my feelings about the fact that I won’t have any more of this fic to read!

monkeybusiness

Whew, that was a good one! Thanks so much for sharing this story

Guest

this was rlly good i loved it

PiedPiper

One of the best kid!fics I’ve read. It’s not cutesy, the kid isn’t used as a prop to help get the main ship together, but Jim still has his own life and personality outside of Peter. Also, the way you handled the K/S elements was very painful and realistic.

jenny8675309

I’m gonna miss this fic

YabbaDabbaDo

This is definitely a fic I’ll be rereading

Guest

Love this!

99Problems

You are really good at writing convincing kids. Peter feels like a real pre-teen, and his grief feels like very real kid-grief. As someone who lost a parent at a young age, I really feel for him.

greenthumb

Wow as a parent this is so relatable.

George Takei 

THAT ENDING UGH! Jeez Imp, this has really been your year, huh? I don’t think you’ve ever been this prolific! Anyway, this might be my favorite out of your new stuff (although the Borg fic is only one chapter in and it’s already up there). I love how Jim’s past experience comes into play here, and how he knows he’s fucking up but isn’t sure how to fix it, and how he eventually settles into it. And also how he’s never sure he made the right decision to leave his crew. Plus all the stuff with Jim’s memories of Sam and Kevin is brilliant as usual. And the pining! Jesus

Guest

This is so good!

Kirklover1230

You write Peter and Jim’s relationship so well that I almost forget about the Spock-shaped hole—until Jim is reminded of him and the pining is activated. I looooove pining (as you know lol) so this is right up my alley.

Halley’s Comet

Aw, this fic is so bittersweet in the best way. There’s different layers to it, too. You have Peter and Jim’s grief and their love for each other and their desire to make this work, and Jim’s conflicted feelings about leaving Starfleet, as well as the way he’s missing Spock. It’s really complex and you weave it all together so expertly. Definitely coming back to this one!

Guest

This intersects with my trauma in a way that was like a one-punch knockout so thanks I guess

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Impala67 PM

My Stories . Bio Fav: Stories . Authors

My Stories 32

First Blood by Impala67 Jim is 12 years old and Tarsus IV is already dying when he goes on his first hunt.

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, words: 7k+, favs: 748, Follows: 683, published: May 20, 2011, J. Kirk

* * *

On the Alabaster Stones by Impala67 Jim meets a man who is everything he wants, without being the man he wants. He’s settling, so it doesn’t even cross his mind to wonder if it might be too good to be true.

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, words: 6k+, favs: 811, follows: 730, published: April 24, 2011, J. Kirk

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Levee’s Gonna Break >> by Impala67 After an encounter with a strange rock formation, Jim is thrust into an alternate reality where the Borg first made contact five years ago. The Federation has since fallen to chaos. With many of the Enterprise crew already assimilated, those remaining are preparing for a suicide mission, a last-gasp attempt to take out the Borg and save what’s left of the galaxy.

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, chapters: 6, words: 17k+, favs: 1k+, follows: 1k+, updated: April 12, 2011, published: November 7, 2010, J. Kirk, Spock

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Dead Men Don’t Wear Red Shirts by Impala67 Doctor McCoy is astounded when three members of the landing party who died on the planet’s surface seemingly come back to life.

StarTrek: The Original Series, K+, English, words: 7k+, favs: 608, follows: 559, published: March 26, 2011, L. McCoy, C. Chapel

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Oh Captain by Impala67 If Jim had wanted to stay in the same place for the rest of his life, doing the same thing over and over, he never would have left Iowa. Being an Admiral has more in common with being a farmer than being a Starship Captain.

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, K+, English, words: 4k+, favs: 412, follows: 385, published: March 6, 2011, J. Kirk

* * *

The Future Is Now by Impala67 A woman who claims to be clairvoyant boards the enterprise amidst a group of refugees whose ship broke down. Everyone who speaks to her seems to be followed by a string of bad luck.

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, words: 6k+, favs: 561, follows: 504, published: February 11, 2011

* * *

Slide Through My Hands >> by Impala67 Following Sam’s death, Jim makes the difficult decision to leave Starfleet and bring Peter to live with him on Earth.

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, chapters: 10, words: 28k+, favs: 961, follows: 905, updated: January 21, 2011, published: May 29, 2010, J. Kirk, P. Kirk

* * *

Doctor, Doctor by Impala67 Turns out there’s nothing special about Doctor Karma, nothing mysterious or underhanded. She’s just a better doctor than he is.

Dr. Sexy, MD, T, English, words: 5k+, favs: 412, follows: 388, published: January 3, 2011, D. Sexy, A. Karma

* * *

Child’s Play by Impala67 The Enterprise crew has a second run-in with one of the energy beings they encountered in The Squire of Gothos—only this time, the child who alters their reality doesn’t even realize he’s doing it.

StarTrek: The Original Series, K+, English, words: 7k+, favs: 861, follows: 789, published: December 21, 2010, J. Kirk, Spock

* * *

Your Weary Head by Impala67 Jim lets her take him to her quarters because he saw Spock looking. Because he saw Spock look away.

StarTrek: The Original Series, M, English, words: 5k+, favs: 877, follows: 712, published: December 1, 2010, J. Kirk, Spock

* * *

Hands On by Impala67 Doctor Sexy walks in on Dr. Karma laying her bare hands on a seriously injured patient in the ICU. When he yanks her hands away, he finds that the man’s wounds have mysteriously disappeared.

Dr. Sexy, MD, T, English, words: 5k+, favs: 574, follows: 526, published: November 19, 2010, D. Sexy, A. Karma

* * *

Just a Shot Away by Impala67 When a powerful being senses intruders on its planet, it manipulates the Enterprise crew members’ perceptions, causing them to turn on one another.

StarTrek: The Original Series, T, English, words: 6k+, favs: 616, follows: 587, published: October 11, 2010

* * *

Spurs by Impala67 Everyone knows Dr. Sexy wears cowboy boots.

Dr. Sexy, MD, M, English, words: 4k+, favs: 203, follows: 199, published: September 10, 2010, D. Sexy, A. Karma

* * *

No More to Roam by Impala67 After he’s made Admiral, Jim dreams of the Enterprise. He dreams of Spock and Bones at his shoulders, the viewscreen spread out before them, each pinprick of light a door to possibility.

StarTrek: The Original Series, K, English, words: 3k+, favs: 418, follows: 362, published: August 9, 2010

* * *

Time Enough by Impala67 On a planet where time is money, Kirk must bet with years off his life in order to save a foolish crew member who lost a big hand. But Jim has something up his sleeve. The trick is not to win at his opponent’s game—it’s to convince his opponent to play Jim’s.

StarTrek: The Original Series, K+, English, words: 4k+, favs: 598, follows: 509, published: July 12, 2010, J. Kirk

* * *

In the End by Impala67 Gen. Spock made his choice: one life in exchange for many. Now there’s nothing left to do but respect it, and to be there with him one last time.

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, K+, English, words: 6k+, favs: 905, follows: 851, published: June 18, 2010, J. Kirk, Spock

* * *

From Perdition >> by Impala67 On an Earth where World War III never happened, Zefram Cochran never invented the warp drive, and the United Federation of Planets never came into being, a Vulcan ambassador is sent to make contact with the first man to command a spaceship that exceeded light speed. A K/S First Contact au

StarTrek: The Original Series, M, English, chapters: 16, words: 59k+, favs: 2k+, follows: 2k+, updated: May 2, 2010, published: November 24, 2008, J. Kirk, Spock

* * *

First Blood by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: T, English, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 7k+, Favs: 748, Follows: 683, Published: May 20, 2011

  
Title: First Blood

Author: Impala67 

Series: TOS

Rating: T

Summary: Jim is 12 years old and Tarsus IV is already dying when he goes on his first hunt.

A/N: Yeah, another Tarsus IV fic from yours truly. It’s a T because the kill scene is pretty graphic and Jim’s reaction is pretty intense. Also for some disturbing themes like genocide. And starvation. And child abuse/endangerment courtesy of Kodos being a sick fuck. I, Gene Roddenberry, own the characters and this world, so it’s my oyster.

💬 for First Blood

unitedfederationofplanets

Jim’s hero worship for Kodos after he “saved” him is so creepy and ominous, especially knowing what he’s planning

Guest

Ow ow OW. Poor baby!Jim

PaintballWizard

God this gave me such rural gay vibes, my dad forcing me to hunt and me hating it, him forcing me to watch the life go out of its eyes, crying and throwing up... fuck

Kirklover1230

Oh this one got me. GOD. I have so many feelings about Jim as a kid and you do it SO WELL. Every time it leaves me stunned.

My O My

Oh my goooood the fact that THIS EXPERIENCE is what led Kodos to choose Jim as one of the survivors makes the whole thing 300x more fucked up

George Takei 

Holy shit Imp! This one really goes for the guts. Why are all your Tarsus IV fics SO GOOD like DAMN. I feel so much for little Jim Kirk, thrust into this horrifying situation and just doing the best he can, and there’s this looming adult who acts like he knows what’s best for him and Jim doesn’t know what to do so he latches onto him, which is the worst thing for him... UGH. Write a book so I can throw money at you this is just getting embarrassing

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey fellas (gn), you ever write fic where an otherworldly being descends to Earth just to touch someone, right after an otherworldly being descended to Earth just to touch you, for No Reason At All? Yeah me neither. 
> 
> Also, when I’m done with this fic, would anyone be interested in a “which of Dean’s fanfics from my Dean Writes Fanfic fic are you” uquiz? Because I might have already started making one LOL


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean’s PMs while living with Lisa and Ben.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was home sick from work today so you get this early. This one is much shorter than the last one.

Private Messaging (PM)

Wow!

🎇 George Takei 

GREAT premise

👤 Impala67 

Thanks.

🎇 George Takei 

I mean you told me you were working on something bigger so I shouldn’t be surprised. But. VERY interested to see where this one’s going.

Private Messaging (PM)

Nice!

👤 PeterPan

Looooove the new fic!

👤 Impala67 

Thanks

Private Messaging (PM)

Your fic

🌉 LolliODolly

I’ve commented on like every chapter so far but I just came here to say that the longfic you’re writing is amaaaaazing!

👤 Impala67 

Thank you

Private Messaging (PM)

Fic

👤 Impala67 

I thought you were refusing to write for the reboot

🎇 George Takei 

Yeah but Zoe is hot and I only have so much willpower

👤 Impala67 

She is. It’s really good btw. Probably should have opened with that

🎇 George Takei 

Aw thanks

Private Messaging (PM)

Hi Imp

🌌 Kirklover1230

Your first contact fic is amazing!!!

👤 Impala67 

Thanks Marisol

🌌 Kirklover1230

Of course! I’m literally in awe... can’t wait for chapter 15!

Private Messaging (PM)

Update

🌅 ChattyCathy65

PLEASE PLEASE update!

👤 Impala67 

Seriously?

Private Messaging (PM)

WHAAAAAT IS THAT?

🎇 George Takei 

WHAT IS THIS???? Oh my god Imp you did nooooot write Dr Sexy fic!!!

👤 Impala67 

Shut up Georgie you literally write Law and Order fic

🎇 George Takei 

So? PLEASE tell me it’s self-insert fic I love watching messy bitches have quarter-life crises

👤 Impala67 

NO

🎇 George Takei 

Lmao. Dr. Karma was a good shipping choice tho she’s hot

Private Messaging (PM)

THIS! FIC!

🎇 George Takei 

Oh my god this is KILLING me HOW did you write such a convincing kid? And the way Spock LITERALLY hasn’t shown up ONCE in this fic but somehow his presence is so felt it’s just... ugh

👤 Impala67 

It’s bc mentally I never left my preteens

🎇 George Takei 

Lolollll. Seriously tho how do you do it?

👤 Impala67 

I was touched by an angel

🎇 George Takei 

Fine. Keep your secrets to yourself

Private Messaging (PM)

Fic

👤 Impala67 

This one’s really good Georgie. TOS and AOS Uhura teaming up is badass

🎇 George Takei 

Thanks Imp!! They have two different dynamics so it’s fun to think about the ways they’re the same vs they ways they’re different

👤 Impala67 

Yeah and TOS Uhura gets to be like a mentor, which is cool

Private Messaging (PM)

!!!!!

🎇 George Takei 

Oh my god oh my god oh my god o hmy god

👤 Impala67 

What’s up Georgie?

🎇 George Takei 

BORG FICCCCC

Seriously man this is so. fuckin. good.

The way the alt versions of the characters are so cynical. Like they’re obviously not EVIL it’s not like mirror!fic, they’re just so tired and hopeless...

🎇 George Takei 

Also stoner!spock is the only bitch I fuck with now

👤 Impala67 

Idk I like him the regular way

🎇 George Takei 

Loser. I mean alt!kirk and alt!spock are fucking right??? I mean of course they are. They have to be. And TOS Jim is gonna catch on and it’s gonna make his head explode

👤 Impala67 

Stop I’m not spoiling my own fic

🎇 George Takei 

I’ll take that as a yes. God I can’t wait for the fallout

Also it’s suuuuch a cool premise but hey what else is new

Private Messaging (PM)

I KNEW IT

🎇 George Takei 

I knew it I knew it I knew it!

Can’t believe this bitch thinks Spock could only love him on mind altering substances tho :/

JIM YOU’RE SO STUPID

👤 Impala67 

Not stupid just illogical

🎇 George Takei 

shut UP!

A moron

🎇 George Takei 

Stupid little gay man

👤 Impala67 

Also important question, what came first, the drugs or them being together

🎇 George Takei 

Oh my god I HATE YOUUUUU

👤 Impala67 

Well alt!kirk IS a dick

I might turn to drugs if I had to deal with him too

🎇 George Takei 

STOPPPPP

Private Messaging (PM)

FP

👤 Paralyzer

Hey are you planning to finish From Perdition?

👤 Paralyzer

It’s just that you put like a year and a half into it and it’s been almost a year since you updated. Not pushing for an update, just honestly curious

👤 Impala67 

If I write more of it I’ll update honestly idk what to tell you

Private Messaging (PM)

EVIL

🎇 George Takei 

Oh my god you’re SO EVIL you’re not even gonna let them get together??? 

I PROMISE fucking Spock is NOT what fucked up the alt galaxy, Jim...

👤 Impala67 

Yeah but maybe it’s what fucked up Spock...

🎇 George Takei 

Pretty sure that was their inevitable failure and the end of the galaxy as they know it

🎇 George Takei 

I mean alt!jim is like SO broken and he’s literally lost all hope but he is NOT EVIL he just literally doesn’t know what else to do and he’s too tired to try and fail again

👤 Impala67 

He’s an asshole

🎇 George Takei 

I mean yeah obviously but he has to kill his literal Borg-ified brother

That would fuck anyone up

👤 Impala67 

He could have figured out how to separate Sam from the Collective if he didn’t just GIVE UP

🎇 George Takei 

They don’t even know that’s possible! They’ve only been dealing with the Borg for 5 years!

Jeez how come I’m defending YOUR character to YOU

👤 Impala67 

No idea he’s a dick

🎇 George Takei 

Ugh I hate this. It’s literally SO GOOD but I hate it

They literally could be together and be happy

Fucj

Private Messaging (PM)

ok

🎇 George Takei 

okay you’re right he’s an asshole

Private Messaging (PM)

From Perdition

🏞 YacketyYak

From Perdition update WHEN?

👤 Impala67 

Gtfo of my inbox

Private Messaging (PM)

Fic

👤 Impala67 

This was awesome. I liked your reboot fics but I’m glad you’re back to TOS

🎇 George Takei 

Home sweet home. I may wander, but I always come back to my one true love TOS Uhura

Private Messaging (PM)

New fic who dis 

🎇 George Takei 

Noooooo baby Jim :(((((

👤 Impala67

thanks I think

🎇 George Takei 

Why do you make me feel things? I resent you for that

He’s just so little and he doesn’t know what to dooooo

I hate Kodos man I wanna stab that asshole

Anyway that was sooooo good.

👤 George Takei 

Thanks Georgie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WELL I made myself sad.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Bobby John raises some doubts, and From Perdition finally gets an update.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is another pretty long chapter. Covers all of season 6. As always, similarities to real fics or authors are not intentional.

Two Officers and a Baby by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: K, English, Humor, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 8k+, Favs: 1k+, Follows: 994, Published: June 15, 2011

Title: Two Officers and a Baby

Author: Impala67 

Series: TOS 

Rating: K

Summary: After landing on a planet where all but one sentient life form have been slaughtered, the crew of the Enterprise suddenly acquire a baby. Jim has experience with babies, learned from the boys’ home he and Kevin lived in on Tarsus IV before the crops began to die, but Spock is quite perplexed.

A/N: Honestly could fit anywhere in TOS. Like a lot of my oneshots, this one is written to mimic the basic episode structure. More cliche than my usual stuff but whatever, if you’re not into fics with babies in them give it a pass. Once again, I’m Gene Roddenberry. If you don’t know who that is, why the hell are you reading Star Trek fic?

💬 for Two Officers and a Baby

MartyMcFly

Oh my god this is SO good! Like it’s hilarious and ridiculous and then it just SLAMS you with feelings and you’re like “what the fuck am I supposed to do with this???” Loved it

Kirklover1230

Omg, BABY!!! This is such a cute fic Imp! And of course it’s you, so you had to slam us to the ground with the feels, but I’m not even mad about it.

Guest

Really funny fic

Dreamweaver98 

Wow, you managed to take what’s on the surface a kind of cracky concept and really marry it with the Star Trek context in a way that brings out some really interesting themes. There’s this thread of nature vs nurture, like is this child destined to be warlike because it was created from warlike beings? Or were those beings warlike because the warlike culture taught them to be? And you never really give a definitive answer, which is the way I think it has to be. 

But it’s important to ask anyway, because in asking that question, you really expose the fact that the Enterprise’s mission, while peaceful, isn’t one they always live up to. Sometimes they have to enact violence, and even if it’s necessary, it’s still violence. So the answer is complicated, because would even a child from a peaceful species end up more warlike if it had to experience the things the Enterprise is sometimes compelled to do to keep the peace?

And that’s why they have to give up the baby in the end. Because, as you bring up, Spock is descended from warlike people. If they went back in time thousands of years, people might look at him and expect him to be violent, to be a soldier of war. But the Vulcans were able to change through the guidance of Surak and his teachings. They chose to be better. So if raised in the right circumstances, this child could choose that too. But the Enterprise isn’t and can’t be the right circumstances. 

And somehow you managed to get all this across in an 8k word humor fic. Sorry this comment is so long, but this oneshot just has so much packed into it. You’re a really masterful writer and I always love reading your work. Can’t wait to see what you do next!

bubbleyum

I love the idea that Jim would be good with babies, while this is like the ONE area where Spock is completely out of his depth. Hilarious and adorable

Betty Davis Eyes

The way Spock starts out all awkward but slowly settles into it and it’s not the way Jim is with him but he’s so good with him in his own way... hnggggg

alligatorator

Loooove how Spock talks to him as if they’re having a real conversation instead of just the baby babbling back at him... it was so cute I died a little. And how when Jim is like “you know he doesn’t understand you, right?” Spock goes on like a thirty minute lecture about brain development—priceless! 

badassbabe

Sooooo sad they didn’t get to keep him :( I mean they’re right he probably shouldn’t be raised like that but :(

Guest

“This infant is highly intelligent, Jim.” LOL

George Takei 

I HATE random-baby trope. You KNOW I hate random-baby trope. Hate hate hate it, like, couldn’t-watch-the-hangover levels of hate it. But I love this fic. Wtf Imp

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💬 for From Perdition

FlippinCoolBro

Oh my god you updated!!!!

mysticruins

OMGGGG UPDATE!!! I have been WAITING for this YES!

callsign007

Love this fic, so I’m really glad you found your inspiration again.

Guest

Oh awesome update, def worth the wajt

Gobbledygook

The way Jim FREAKS OUT about the mind meld is so funny “what do you mean you’re gonna touch my soul???” Like Spock definitely could have found a better way to phrase that...

Guest

Yes yes yes omg YES! I’m so glad you updated this!!!

cetieelatemybrain

Kakdnfisisjfnsksksnaka (if you have questions see my username)

DoYouBelieveInMagic

This is SUCH a good update I’m not even mad about the wait. Like, I would fully believe you spent all of the past eighteen months doing nothing but perfecting this chaptwr

ihardlyknowher

“I believe the ‘primitive barbarian’ has the floor” fuccccck I love your Spock

Worfified

I think it’s really interesting how you kind of expanded on canon to make the katra tied into the regular mind meld. It makes sense because if you can transfer your katra into someone else then it would have to be involved in the ritual somehow. I know you didn’t really go into it, but the fact that it’s canonically possible to survive without a katra makes it really interesting—is the katra what powers the meld in the first place? Like is it an intrinsic part of Vulcans or just what gives their telepathy juice? I know that wasn’t really your point but it made me think.

Guest

Love love love love love!

AppleBottomJeans

I was so psyched to see you updated! And I was NOT disappointed this update was so good! Already can’t wait for the next one!

Mickey4011

This was rad. Hope we don’t have to wait another year and a half for the next one tho

MaceWinduIsCoolerThanYou

Oh my god what an update! I am embarrassed to admit that I reread this whole fic twice while I was waiting lol

Guest

God, no one else in this fandom writes Spock like you

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Not Feelin Too Good Myself by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: K+, English, General, J. Kirk, L. McCoy, Words: 6k+, Favs: 680, Follows: 637, Published: September 8, 2011

Title: Not Feelin Too Good Myself

Author: Impala67 

Series: TOS 

Rating: K+

Summary: Complaining is one of Bones’ favorite pastimes. Jim thinks they can be forgiven for not noticing sooner.

A/N: Genfic. It’s been a while since I wrote a Bones-centric fic, so here you go. I’m Gene Roddenberry, creator of Star Trek, and I don’t need to disclaim my own characters and ideas.

💬 for Not Feelin Too Good Myself

clytemnestra

I love all the Bones love! He’s grouchy and gruff but he has so much love for his daughter and all his friends

George Takei

This is awesome! I do think Kirk in particular has a tendency to be pretty self-absorbed and think he’s always right, and he has protagonist syndrome so usually he IS right (at least within the story), but it’s nice to see him have to reckon with that and how it affects his relationships

NothinButMyBones

THANK YOU for giving Bones all the recognition and care that he deserves!!! He’s right, he does so much for everybody and they need to be there for him just as much!

Guest

Ugh this made me feel so much love for all of them god

Sam Vimes

I love how you manage to turn Kirk being an asshole into a learning experience for him instead of just bashing him and having the whole thing be him like groveling, which I think these kind of fics can turn into really easily. You managed to pack a lot of nuance into this.

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In the Usual Way by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: T, English, Angst & Family, J. Kirk, C. Marcus, Words: 10k+, Favs: 632, Follows: 609, Published: October 22, 2011

Title: In the Usual Way

Author: Impala67 

Series: TOS

Rating: T

Summary: Carol doesn’t want Jim to be in David’s life. And the worst part is, Jim understands completely.

A/N: This starts around five years before TOS, while Carol is still pregnant, and continues through to when Jim meets David as an adult in Wrath of Kahn. It’s fully canon-compliant, since WoK implies that David met Kirk as a kid but didn’t know who he was. There’s discussion of unplanned pregnancy obviously, so just like. Be aware. I’m Gene Roddenberry, the man who needs no introduction or disclaimer.

💬 for In the Usual Way

fishandchips

This is such a good exploration of Jim’s feelings for David! You can really see from the bond they develop in stii that Jim really wished things had been different with David, and you nail that mood in this story perfectly. He just wants what’s best for David, even if it’s not what makes Jim happy, and that’s really what being a good parent is all about

George Takei

It’s kind of heartbreaking how they try so hard to make it work in the beginning but they just... can’t. And Jim’s not even running his own ship yet, so they both know it’s just going to get harder. I should have EXPECTED this from you Imp UGH

Guest

I see your cat’s in the cradle reference! And I mean it’s obviously not the same situation, but it has the same kind of wistful regret to it that the song makes you feel.

FreezerBurn

Wow I actually... like Carol at the end of this?

JustLikeBuddyHolly

Once again you knock it out of the park with kid characterization, as well as parent/kid interaction.

Guest

I love how you manage to do this without villainizing Carol. It’s so bittersweet, how Jim wishes it had been different but knows that this is the way it has to be

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Soul Survivor by Impala67

📜 Movies >> Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan Rated: T, English, Humor & Angst, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 13k+, Favs: 979, Follows: 1k+, Published: November 4, 2011, Updated: January 18, 2012

Title: Soul Survivor

Author: Impala67 

Movie: Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

Rating: T

Summary: “Turns out, everybody knew that Spock was alive except Jim.” They accidentally bring Spock back *without* his katra. Chaos ensues.

A/N: Once again, this one retcons ST3, so I’m putting it in Wrath of Khan because fuck ST3. It’s genfic, not slash, so sorry if that’s what you came for. Yeah I recognize that the title sucks balls, no I’m not gonna change it. My name is Gene Roddenberry, you might have heard of me. If you have, you know why I don’t need a disclaimer.

💬 for Soul Survivor

BellaDonna

This is so funny oh my god! Poor Jim!

Kirklover1230

Kind of expected Spock without his katra to be just like the evil side of Kirk in The Enemy Within, but his Vulcan discipline is still 100% intact. It really goes to show that the Vulcan moral code is like. A conscious choice all Vulcans have to make. Which is just so interesting to me!

Worfified

Not to be weird but was this inspired by my comment on your From Perdition update? Because you really took that idea and ran with it in the most hilarious possible way.

George Takei 

Oh my GOD Jim has spent all this time MOURNING him and it turns out he’s just been running around without a soul and everyone just felt too awkward to tell him about it, and/or they’re trying to respect Spock’s wishes by not telling him... and of course soulless Spock is only thinking logically, i.e. telling him will only hurt him and lead to awkwardness and sadness when Jim’s old feelings aren’t returned anymore, and on top of that Spock isn’t missing him at all, so he feels no need to run and tell Jim himself... what the FUCK Imp!!!!

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Funhouse Mirror by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: T, English, Sci-Fi, J. Kirk, H. Sulu, Words: 9k+, Favs: 1k+, Follows: 1k+, Published: February 29, 2012

Title: Funhouse Mirror

Author: Impala67 

Series: TOS

Rating: T

Summary: Kirk and Sulu find themselves trapped in an alternate universe where they are actors on a television show—and, apparently, they hate each other. They try to go to Spock for assistance, hoping he will provide a beacon of logic to combat the bizarre, only to find that he’s calling himself Leonard. Jim finds his personality shift deeply disturbing. He makes real jokes and smiles way too much. And oh, yeah—his ears are apparently detachable.

A/N: This DOES have real people in it, so if you’re not into that definitely take a pass on this one. Ironically, Shatner and George Takei are the only members of the bridge crew cast who DON’T show up. Honesty doesn’t paint Shatner in the best light tho. That was supposed to say “honestly” but I’m leaving it because it’s actually more accurate with the error. This fic is completely stupid and ridiculous. Also, there’s some mention/brief instances of racism and sexism because we know that shit happened, but the characters don’t tolerate it. Once again, I’m Gene Roddenberry, which I’m pretty sure makes this a self-insert fic.

💬 for Funhouse Mirror

Guest

Honestly came here expecting badfic but ended up having such a good time!

2dayistheday

Awww, poor Jim is so sad like “this isn’t Spock :(“

Guest

It’s sooooo funny how you capitalized on the Shatner/Takei rivalry and Sulu and Kirk are like “ummm what the fuck?” and everyone else is like “wait they’re actually... talking to each other? Civilly?” Lol!

PinkElephants99

This was great!

TinkerBellBoots

Honestly I don’t usually like fics that have real people in them but having the characters take the place of the actors was a really interesting work-around. 

George Takei 

Oh my GOD Imp this is SO up my alley I’m honestly PISSED I didn’t write this!!! Having Kirk rag on Shatner must have been legitimately so cathartic. Seriously your MIND.

Guest

I have seen a lot of fics where the actors and characters interact, but this one was honestly one of the most hilarious and creative ones I’ve read

heartbreaker25

This was so funny! Love all the interactions between Kirk, Sulu, and the cast!

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Dominoes by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: T, English, Sci-Fi, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 12k+, Favs: 1k+, Follows: 1k+, Published: May 12, 2012

Title: Dominoes

Author: Impala67 

Series: TOS

Rating: T

Summary: City on the Edge of Forever AU. Instead of 1930s New York, they end up in 1912, in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.

A/N: This is definitely the longest oneshot I’ve ever written. I promise this has nothing to do with the godawful movie. There’s no one named Jack and no one named Rose, and definitely no “this door ain’t big enough for the two of us” bullshit on THIS ship. Because I’m Gene Roddenberry and I’m actually good at writing stories. Just see my TV series for proof. Deals with the obvious themes of mass death and tragedy, plus a fuckton of moral ambiguity. 

💬 for Dominoes

Guest

Ugh ugh ugh. How do you grieve a thousand people you never really even knew?

Beetlejuice

Damn! I was having so much fun imagining them in period clothing that I wasn’t ready to be body-slammed by emotions

Guest

You’re right, it’s nothing like the movie. That was overwrought and melodramatic, whereas this is devastating and honestly horrible to contemplate

George Takei 

Holy SHIT this one is heavy bro. Like damn. I mean it’s one thing to have to let one person die to keep the future from going to shit, but that’s like 15 hundred people!! When you say moral ambiguity you really mean it huh? And the way you show that affecting them psychologically... oof 

Poltergeist182

I am obsessed with this story

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The Gun by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: K+, English, Western, J. Kirk, Words: 5k+, Favs: 596, Follows: 542, Published: May 30, 2012

Title: The Gun

Author: Impala67 

Series: TOS

Rating: K+

Summary: In Spectre of the Gun, Jim pulls the trigger on Morgan Earp.

A/N: Episode-specific AU for Spectre of the Gun. I guess I’m on a morally questionable kick this month. I like cowboys and shootouts. Sue me. I am Gene Roddenberry, so I own all of this and I can do what I want with it. It’s good to be me.

💬 for The Gun

Guest

Well, shit.

peoniesinbloom

I do have to admit that I kind of like it when Kirk goes dark side.

George Takei 

OF COURSE you put them in actual period clothes. Not even surprised. The idea of Kirk in a hat and spurs is pretty hilarious not gonna lie

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Insidious by Impala67

📜 Movies >> Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan Rated: T, English, Horror, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 6k+, Favs: 908, Follows: 871, Published: June 3, 2012

Title: Insidious

Author: Impala67 

Movie: Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

Rating: T

Summary: After stealing the Genesis Device, Kahn takes it to the nearest inhabited planet to hide amongst the people there. What the Enterprise Crew doesn’t know is that he took the Ceti Eels with him.

A/N: AU of Wrath of Khan where Khan takes the device to a neighboring planet instead of back to Ceti Alpha V. It’s set up kind of like a horror movie and has some really disturbing themes. I’m Gene Roddenberry, so this is my world and you’re all just living here. Don’t bug me or I’ll make you start paying rent.

💬 for Insidious

Guest

I was really hoping it wouldn’t be the little boy but I think I knew deep down the whole time

Kirklover1230

Wow, this is so so creepy. It’s been a while since you wrote a straight-up horror fic but you still do it just as well as you always have.

Guest

Oh my GOD

jollyroger

This is fantastic. The way that they come in to find the town devastated, and then the way it’s slowly revealed that there’s something wrong, and the feeling of dread grows... and the twist with the little brother having had the eel in his head the whole time was so good. Legitimate horror, which actually doesn’t show up in the horror genre category on here as often as it should

VulcanSalute

This was definitely one of the scariest fics I’ve read in a while. There’s something about creepy children that gets me every time.

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The Art of Forgetting by Impala67

📜 TV >> StarTrek: The Original Series Rated: K+, English, Angst, J. Kirk, Spock, Words: 5k+, Favs: 703, Follows: 685, Published: June 15, 2012

Title: The Art of Forgetting

Author: Impala67 

Series: TOS

Rating: K+

Summary: “What happens to the ones who forget?” After accidentally traveling back in time, Jim connects with a woman and her young son. However, during the Enterprise’s attempts to retrieve their lost crewmates, they see things they shouldn’t. In order to avoid violating the Prime Directive, Spock must block the memories from their minds.

A/N: This one’s just fucking sad. Yeah. Anyway, insert obligatory I’m-Gene-Roddenberry claim here.

💬 for The Art of Forgetting

My O My

Ouch. This one came at me from every direction. Kirk’s grief, Spock’s longing, the way Liz and Eli will always feel a sense of loss and never remember why... god. You really balance all of these things so well, and there’s a real felt sense to it.

Kirklover1230

I honestly can’t BELIEVE Jim can’t tell Spock’s in love with him.

George Takei

GOD Imp, you are really the only one out here writing realistic kids. You’re right, it’s sad as hell, but I love it. The emotions are all so real.

banalities

Poor Jim, poor Spock, poor Liz, poor kid. No one got out of this one unscathed, huh?

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He was SO CLOSE TO GETTING IT with Bobby John I’m—
> 
> Anyway, hope you like it.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean’s private messages over the time encompassed by chapter 5.

Private Messaging (PM)

Finally

🎇 George Takei 

I see you’ve finally found the genre option menu

👤 Impala67 

Shut up

🎇 George Takei

Lol. Seriously tho, I’m SO MAD you made me like a random baby fic. I hate that shit. You KNOW how much I hate it. HOW do you do it

👤 Impala67 

I guess I know you too well. I crafted the perfect trojan horse. Like giving a baby medicine in their milk

🎇 George Takei 

Oh god. I’m random baby

👤 Impala67 

You know what they say. We hate most in others what we don’t like in ourselves. Or something

🎇 George Takei 

Not true. I don’t see any of myself in you

Private Messaging (PM)

Fic

👤 Impala67 

Bro captain Uhura is GENUINELY inspired

🎇 George Takei 

It is not. It’s def been done before

👤 Impala67 

Whatever. It’s never been done like this. Now I’m legit pissed she never got to be captain in canon

🎇 George Takei 

You and me both pal

Private Messaging (PM)

Annoying!!!

🎇 George Takei 

Oh my god people are so obnoxious how do you deal with it?

👤 Impala67 

What?

🎇 George Takei 

As SOON as you update they’re already being so annoying and needy asking about the next chapter

So glad only my 500 loyal followers ever interact with my fic

👤 Impala67 

That’s the biggest fucking joke honestly like you should have way more people reading your fic than me

🎇 George Takei 

Not everyone imprinted on my fic when they were still undergoing puberty Imp

👤 Impala67 

You’re objectively a better writer dude. They’re just morons

🎇 George Takei 

Look, I’m not mad about it. Like I said, I would hate to have a wide enough appeal that people I don’t even know demand things from me lol

👤 Impala67 

Doesn’t change the fact they’re idiots

🎇 George Takei 

Thanks Imp. I mean we already knew that, but thanks

Private Messaging (PM)

Dude

🎇 George Takei 

Dude you should write Bones more often

👤 Impala67 

Yeah. He definitely deserves more appreciation

Private Messaging (PM)

!!!

🎇 George Takei 

It’s actually wild how far you’ve come from your cardboard cutout female character days. Your Carol’s such a complex character, with her own motivations and little inconsistencies and flaws, but under that she’s really just trying to do what’s best for her kid

👤 Impala67 

How many times do I have to tell you I was SEVENTEEN. ALL my characters were cardboard cutouts

🎇 George Takei 

No. Your men weren’t cardboard cutouts, just big action heroes who had no personalities outside that identity

Like you know how straight people write queer people and make that their entire personality? Your early Kirk’s entire personality was “straight”

👤 Impala67 

Thanks

🎇 George Takei 

Hey you grew out of it. Not something all men can say

Private Messaging (PM)

!!!!

🎇 George Takei 

Omg how is soulless Spock simultaneously SO unsettling and SO hilarious? And the way Bones realizes that logic DIDN’T make Spock soulless, in the face of actually soulless Spock!! Anyway this fic was genuinely upsetting

👤 Impala67 

Good that’s what I was going for

🎇 George Takei 

Well congrats it worked!

Spock DOESN’T MISS HIM. He’s been alive for months and he DOESN’T EVEN MISS HIM. FUCK. Sometimes I hate you

👤 Impala67 

Love you too

Private Messaging (PM)

PISSED

🎇 George Takei 

I am honestly SO MAD that I didn’t write this fic! Like so mad! This concept is so good I feel so much creative envy right now

👤 Impala67 

Guess I was inspired

🎇 George Takei 

Seriously using Kirk and Sulu was the perfect choice. Loooove how they pretty much bankrupted Shatner to buy all the obscure shit they needed for the communicator! And Kirk angsting over Nimoy being Not Spock was hilarious. Especially how Sulu is like “this guy is funny and nice and relatable and awesome” and Jim is like “where’s :( Spock :(“

👤 Impala67 

Yeah them walking up to him and calling him Spock and talking about being stuck in an alt universe or back in time, and Nimoy just thinking they’re running lines and breaking character to ask them to repeat was the first part I wrote.

🎇 George Takei 

SO funny. And the fact that the episode they were filming has the exact same premise as the fic was genius

ONLY way it could have been better is if you found a way to kill off 

🎇 George Takei 

Maybe I’ll write one where it’s Spock and Uhura and they spend the whole time staring at Shatner being like “who is this horrible little man? This is Not My Captain”

👤 Impala67 

I would read the shit out of that

Private Messaging (PM)

Funhouse Mirror

🕸 NotoriousBFG 

Dude I broke my no RPF rule for this fic and you did NOT disappoint

👤 Impala67 

Thanks man

🕸 NotoriousBFG 

No problemo! Thank YOU for writing!

Private Messaging (PM)

Omg!

🎇 George Takei 

Ooooomg dude I loved that fic I was OBSESSED with The Titanic as a kid

Like not the movie the actual ship. Although I was a baby lesbian so Kate Winslet made a pretty convincing case for the movie too

👤 Impala67 

I want to pretend I never saw it but it was a movie with car sex in it so yeah. I’ve seen it. And you’re right

🎇 George Takei 

You showed great restraint not adapting that into a K/S scene

Also this gave me so many Bones feelings

🎇 George Takei 

Like he’s a doctor of course he’s gonna save everyone :(

👤 Impala67 

Yeah. It’s definitely not a decision anyone should have to make

Private Messaging (PM)

Lol

🎇 George Takei 

I love how everything is the same except they’re wearing cowboy hats and Kirk becomes a murderer

👤 Impala67 

Yeah that’s on-brand for me

🎇 George Takei 

Oh DEFINITELY

Private Messaging (PM)

Hi!!!

🌌 Kirklover1230

Hey, I took a little break from fandom for a while there, and I just wanted to let you know that coming back and seeing three new fics from you actually made me scream a little. Anyway that’s why I just spammed all your stuff with comments haha

👤 Impala67 

Hi Marisol. Thanks. Everything good with you?

🌌 Kirklover1230

Oh yeah fine! Real life just got a little too real for a while there lol

👤 Impala67 

Yeah. I know the feeling

Private Messaging (PM)

Fic

👤 Impala67 

Holy shit you actually wrote it

🎇 George Takei 

Well I had your blessing

I’ve already had three people accuse me of stealing your premise btw

👤 Impala67 

Well hopefully they see my comment and shut the fuck up. I mean you literally linked me in your A/N

People are so fuckin dumb

🎇 George Takei 

Yeah. Too bad we need them to give us that sweet sweet dose of serotonin

👤 Impala67 

Was literally happy when it was just you Lib and three other people reading my shit

Anyway the way they spoke in Vulcan the whole time was hilarious. And how neither of them knew they even had lines, and Spock kept stopping production to correct them, and Uhura made up random things to say because all the “languages” coming through the comms were literally gibberish. And everyone was just like “huh are they just really dedicated to their roles or having twin mental breaks?”

🎇 George Takei 

Well there was no rivalry to distract people from how fucking weird they were acting in general

👤 Impala67 

Except their newfound rivalry with Shatner

🎇 George Takei 

Yeah lol. All the cool kids hate that guy

Private Messaging (PM)

Wow

🎇 George Takei 

Your most recent fic is deeply fucking disturbing jsyk. Really, really good. But disturbing as fuck

👤 Impala67 

Yeah it was supposed to be

🎇 George Takei 

Oh I know. It’s like it’s 1998 all over again. I always forget that you literally made your reputation on horror

👤 Impala67 

Yeah I was pretty one-note back then

🎇 George Takei 

Yeah horror and misogyny. A winning combination

👤 Impala67 

In my defense those things are historically linked

🎇 George Takei 

Point. Although I will say your final girl was always a slut, which gives you some points. Also always a man, which takes them away again

👤 Impala67 

Ha ha

🎇 George Takei 

I have to say Kirk’s shirt ripping in every one was some admirable loyalty to the source material

Private Messaging (PM)

Hey

👤 Impala67 

Beta?

🎇 George Takei 

You know it. Sock it to me

Also, first actually choosing a genre and now asking for a beta? It’s almost like you’re a real boy now!

👤 Impala67

Jesus just read it pls

🎇 George Takei 

Patience grasshopper

Private Messaging (PM)

Beta

🎇 George Takei 

You write kids SO WELL god...

👤 Impala67 

Thanks

🎇 George Takei 

Okay but this is a compliment sandwich which means there’s shit in the middle so I’ll just come out with it... I think your female characters only feel real when they’re not in love with Kirk and he’s not in love with them and that’s where the angst is coming from. Like your Carol from the baby daddy fic. SO good. So in comparison this was like. Blah

👤 Impala67 

Wow

🎇 George Takei 

Sorry! 

Look okay she’s NOT a cardboard cutout but she IS just an excuse for Kirk to have kid angst... seriously you’ve been posting so much depressing kid stuff lately are you okay?

👤 Impala67

Can we just talk about my fic?

🎇 George Takei 

Okay but remember you asked. It kind of just feels like you’re trying too hard. Idk. Like you TELL us they were perfect for each other but I just don’t feel it. Like your Action Hero Male Power Fantasy Kirk of yesteryear except the love interest version of that

👤 Impala67 

How the hell do I fix that?

🎇 George Takei 

Honestly? Lean into the kid stuff. The structure of the fic kind of hinges on the mom’s love-interest-ification

Like when Jim tells the kid to take care of his mom?? That line hits like a mack truck 

👤 Impala67 

All right. I mean I was looking for a spot for like. Grammar mistakes. But I guess this helps too

🎇 George Takei 

You know I love you. It’s really good seriously

👤 Impala67 

Okay. Thanks

Seriously

🎇 George Takei 

Np! Can’t wait to read the final product!

Private Messaging (PM)

Omg

🎇 George Takei 

Wow you really turned it around! It was absolutely PERFECT to add the callback/parallel to requiem for methuselah which Jim DOESN’T REMEMBER! That fucked me up. Still can’t BELIEVE Spock made him forget that like wow. Like Jim doesn’t even realize that the exact same thing happened to him. And the reader knows that the comparison is there but Jim doesn’t! Delicious dramatic irony. But then the way that you hint at maybe some subconscious knowledge when Jim talks about how there’s an art to forgetting... like maybe the only reason Spock could make him forget is because a part of him wanted to forget... and did this woman and this child want on some level to forget him too?

👤 Impala67 

Wow guess you really liked it huh

🎇 George Takei 

Dude I couldn’t have SUGGESTED better changes. Of course you made it even fucking sadder...

👤 Impala67 

Yeah well. Sad is kinda my schtick

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy deancas wedding day everybody!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some of Impala67’s readers discuss the controversy around his work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so you guys, I love this chapter soooo much because I literally wrote none of it! Three of my tumblr mutuals decided to RP as in-verse Impala67 readers on their discord, and this chapter is the result. It’s literally so much fun and I was floored when I read through it, it’s so good! They’re katebushstandean, rowenacoded (AO3 sourpastels), and monalisssasandmadhatters (AO3 alittleduck) on tumblr if you want to shower them with compliments about how rad this is. Seriously, thank you guys so much for sharing this with me and letting me include it in the fic!
> 
> Right now it’s 2012, so Discord doesn’t exist. So we’re going with Gchat. Lucky for me Gchat in 2012 looked mostly like ffn PMs. The only edits I made were solely to make the conversation understandable through the Gchat format, plus some clarification around Peter and Georgie.

January 18, 2011

  
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🟢 keep-on-trekkin, omegakirk, starrysulu, su...

📹📞👤➕

🦦 omegakirk

Impala67 writes great fic and I don’t want to call him overrated but I feel weird about him being so big in the fandom sometimes. Like, why is a straight man so invested in this space with so many young, impressionable women?

🍓 superslice

What exactly are you accusing him of? And also, you expect me to believe the person who wrote THAT bathroom scene in the Hooker!fic is straight? There’s no way.

🦦 omegakirk

Hold on let me add trekkin

➖↗️❌

🟢 keep-on-trekkin, omegakirk, starrysulu, su...

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

Hopefully they’re on

🦦 omegakirk

They’re active so idk but it’s worth a shot

Hey trekkin

🏔 keep-on-trekkin

Hey. Hold on a sec let me read back

Oh we’re talking about Imp again. Should have known

Okay. So I mean, when I asked him to participate in the queer retrospective (thank you guys for your contributions btw), he said he was straight. I was surprised too, especially since Georgie didn’t mention it, but that’s what he said.

➖↗️❌

🟢 keep-on-trekkin, omegakirk, starrysulu, su...

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

The man wrote Sailor Moon fic, come on.

🐙 starrysulu

There’s a very easy explanation for that and it’s called: fetishization. Plus, that was a different Impala anyway.

🍓 superslice

So he SAYS. There’s so many similar themes in those as his K/S fics, and you have to admit the writing is fantastic.

🐙 starrysulu

The writing IS fantastic, which is why I don’t think it’s him. Have you seen his old ST fic?? He couldn’t write women to save his life. Those Sailor Moon fics are from before MYMU, there’s no way they’re his.

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🟢 keep-on-trekkin, omegakirk, starrysulu, su...

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

He can’t write women when they’re love interests for Kirk but even back then his women were interesting separate from Kirk! It’s totally reasonable that his Sailor Moon fic would have good characterization and rich female characters.

🦦 omegakirk

You really think he watches Sailor Moon???

🏔 keep-on-trekkin

Idk guys I’m with slice, I can see why he’d want to distance himself from those Sailor Moon fics...

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🟢 keep-on-trekkin, omegakirk, starrysulu, su...

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

And I mean... we all saw the Dr. Sexy fics, I don’t think it’s possible to guess what he watches. Look, all I’m saying is there are a lot of similarities and if he’s lying about writing those, then maybe he’s lying about something else *cough* and we shouldn’t question his place in queer fandom spaces.

🐙 starrysulu

While we’re on the topic of what he watches: I don’t ever want to falsely accuse someone of plagiarism, but he’s so big he gets a free pass for ripping off other writers. “What is and What Can

➖↗️❌

🟢 keep-on-trekkin, omegakirk, starrysulu, su...

📹📞👤➕

Never Be” is the exact premise of one of the Supernatural books (I know they’re niche but it’s still so blatant. Even the title is almost exactly the same!).

🦦 omegakirk

Wait, really? I didn’t know that. Yet another reason people shouldn’t worship the ground he walks on.

🍓 superslice

That’s a reach...

🐙 starrysulu

His url is LITERALLY a Supernatural reference. Don’t try to tell me he didn’t know he was ripping off Carver Edlund. I’m tired of straight men getting a pass for anything.

➖↗️❌

🟢 keep-on-trekkin, omegakirk, starrysulu, su...

📹📞👤➕

reference. Don’t try to tell me he didn’t know he was ripping off Carver Edlund. I’m tired of straight men getting a pass for anything.

🏔 keep-on-trekkin

Honestly? Same. Okay guys this has been fun but I gotta bounce. Essays to write, etc.

🍓 superslice

Okay, bye trekkin!

🐙 starrysulu

Bye!!!

🦦 omegakirk

Bye, trekkin!

  
  


* * *

June 21, 2012

  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice 

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

two is my limit i can’t read that sorry stars

🐙 starrysulu

</3

🍓 superslice

you will never be Impala67

🐙 starrysulu

who fucking CARES impala67 is a plagiarizer who fetishizes gay people

🍓 superslice

i accept the plagiarism accusations look kinda damning but i STAND BY the fact that he’s working through things and we should let him do that plus he writes k/s so beautifully i REALLY

  
➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

don’t think it’s fetishization. the person who all but called him a predator is INSANE sorry

🐙 starrysulu

like the issue isn’t his stories it’s like what doesn’t he just SAY they were inspired by supernatural? this is fanfiction dude it’s okay to admit you got ur ideas from someone else lmao

i mean if he really is a straight man I think it was hella inappropriate of him to do that sailor moon fic like i don’t care what u say it was gross and fetishizing

but no one knows if it’s him or not so like innocent until proven guilty i guess

  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

okay i get what you’re saying like his fic “what is and what can never be” vs. “what is and what should never be” with the djinn is SO blatant he should have tagged it as fusion or acknowledged it but also he’s has the impala67 handle since long before the books were published and MYMU which people say is a straight up ripoff of john’s revenge in the books was published BEFORE the books. actually now that I think about it WIASCNB was published slightly before edlund’s book so this entire argument falls apart. only semi-joking hot take edlund is plagiarizing IMP

also didn’t YOU say there was no way he wrote the sailor moon fic?

🐙 starrysulu

its been over a year i can change my mind!!

  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🦦 omegakirk

are you guys discoursing without me

🐙 starrysulu

wait wait wait i think slice is onto something carver edlund IS a pen name and he’s never been seen in public... is IMP carver edlund???

🍓 superslice

re: sailor moon i’m still up in the air about if i think he wrote them or not but also i’m willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and say he’s grown since then like i’m not dismissing the fetishization but. it was literally like FIFTEEN years ago and he wrote it when he was a TEENAGER (they were all published shortly after his kirk/oc stuff so i’m extrapolating, assuming it is him)

  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🦦 omegakirk

PLEASE imp’s writing is way better :// you think the man who wrote hooker!fic would also write something like route 666?

🐙 starrysulu

it’s literally like. this is a fandom space for by and ABOUT queer people im sorry but I DO think we should be more critical of straight people who want to join

🍓 superslice

and like. if he really DID write the sailor moon stuff that kinda could explain all he weird busty asian beauties stuff in the books...like yikes but again, all that in the books was like. 10 years ago

  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

i mean he did write kirk/cardboard cutout for YEARS so anythings possible

🍓 superslice

ugh you’re right there’s no way they’re the same writer so i’m back to edlund is plagiarizing imp...also stars like i get it but that’s some serious gatekeeping like straight people CAN write fic too if they do it tastefully which i think he largely does, schrodinger’s sailor moon fic notwithstanding

🐙 starrysulu

i really don’t think we should be excusing fandom racism no matter HOW long ago it was

im an imp is edlund truther i think he’s a much worse/ more problematic writer than most people in this fandom want to admit

  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🦦 omegakirk

he’s IMPROVED while edlund is still churning out the same content every other book and only caring about his two annoying macho men characters who would rather fight demons than go to therapy ://

🍓 superslice

no you’re right stars i just mean like. i think it’s possible to criticize that while also recognizing that his current stuff is like. GOD TIER fic

like. imp moved past his very evident male power fantasies in his earlier fics while edlund has CLEARLY not

also stars elaborate? besides the sailor moon stuff (which we don’t know is him) and his old cardboard cutout women he wrote when he was 17

  
➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🦦 omegakirk

true about the racism imp should apologize for this one :// i sent him a message about it once but he never replied

🍓 superslice

omg he never replied?????? yikes.............

🦦 omegakirk

i mean he seems like a busy guy!! remember that like year long break he took a while ago? maybe he just didn’t see it

🍓 superslice

like at least own up to this stuff like he’s said multiple times his old fics are kinda shitty but like admit they’re problematic too... (still love MYMU tho fa;lskdjgklg)  


  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

oh yea true i forgot about that thank god he came back idk what i’d do without the borg fic LMAO

🐙 starrysulu

okay honestly i think that a lot of his more recent stuff has been like SUPER myopic and depressing like every time he updates im just like fic is not therapy and tbh i’ll say it i DO think hooker!fic is overrated

like it’s good but i don’t know its so bleak like wheres the hope? has this dude EVER written a happy ending?

gay people DESERVE that it’s just another straight person who can’t see a happy ending for gay men and im tired of it

i dunno about him being too busy to pm you

  
➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

back OK he seems to reply to like every single comment and he gets hundreds on every fic

🍓 superslice

oh god don’t say that out loud ppl will KILL YOU lmaoo like. i think people overhype ANY fandom classic fic but it IS really well written and the bathroom scene hits EVERY time. but you’re right about the endings he hasn’t had a TRULY happy ending since... well, the hooker fic lkajsdflkj. his stuff has been bleak lately but it’s still really well-done so

oh wait that was a really good point i didn’t think about it that way. he’s written hopeful endings before tho!!! ugh idk i do hope he writes happier

  
➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

stuff soon-- he’d BETTER give From Perdition a happy ending if he ever updates it again smh

also really??? i never get replies on my comments i only get replies when i’m brave enough to DM ugh

🐙 starrysulu

ik ik a;lskdfjaslfkj it’s my fandom hot take i mean it is good its just not my fav???

ohhh no i checked you guys are right i was thinking of georgietakeismh

okay from perdition is like the one fic of his that makes me think that maybe MAYBE he deserves his fandom rep

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

ok my fandom hot take that would get me killed is that sam is an overrated character like he was in ONE episode why does imp put him in every god damn fic????? peter (his OC from “slide through my hands”) is way more interesting tbh

🦦 omegakirk

no no peter is another one hit wonder he really is sam’s son he shows up in literally one scene in one ep

🐙 starrysulu

oh yeah i remember that OK, and he’s in like a deleted scene or something.

if FP ends with like ... spock confessing his love and then immediately dying for jim or something ASININELY dumb like that i’ll deny ever praising it tho

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

omg i LOVE georgietakei the ONLY one i trust with uhura

🦦 omegakirk

Wait is georgietakei the same as George Takei?

🍓 superslice

akskfnsjksk yeah she’s georgietakei on LJ

🦦 omegakirk

oh yeah all of her stuff is so good. honestly i DO like imp but i think georgie should be more popular :// even a fandom full of women hates women i guess

🍓 superslice

WE’LL GET YOU TO BE AN IMP STAN EVENTUALLY ASLKLFJKF oh god don’t

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

even say that about the ending imp would never do that to us...although based on his other stuff recently maybe he would!

🐙 starrysulu

also about sam literally asl;kdfjaslfkj fucking what??? like half his fics have this random ONE EPISODE CHARACTER who is basically an imp oc at this point??? like his sam isn’t even really based off canon sam that’s a HUGE pet peeve of mine

that’s exactly what im afraid of he’s gonna like kill spock off then endgame jim with some woman or end it without jim ever telling spock how he feels for that stupid straight plausible deniability or “gay tragedy” or whatever he’s wacking off to this yr

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

no OK you’re right like. she’s tied with imp for my FAVORITE writer in maybe any fandom i’m sad she only writes uhura mainly bc i’d LOVE to see what she does with other characters. her spock in the tv alternate universe spinoff she wrote????? SO good

🦦 omegakirk

if you hate oc’s that’s your problem not imp’s problem :// sam COULD be a full oc i would still read imp’s works

🐙 starrysulu

GEORGIETAKEI FOR PRESIDENT OF THE GALAXY

🍓 superslice

BUT NOW WE’VE SAID IT STARS!!!! PETER>>>>SAM

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

BUT NOW WE’VE SAID IT wow imp actually using characters from the star trek extended universe instead of his one whiny oc ?? might just make me a stan

🍓 superslice

i DON’T hate OCs that’s the thing. every oc imp makes is sooooo good and fleshed out so why make such a fuss over an actual canon character it doesn’t make sense to me

🐙 starrysulu

YEAH also sam sucks he’s like his own mary sue but he’s a brat and he never even appreciates what jim does???

i mean sometimes it seems like even IMP hates sam

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

that might be a little harsh i think we DO get glimpses of his internal life i just. don’t find it compelling bc every fic they seem to have the same dynamic/issues over and over. that’s why the introduction of peter was so interesting it was the same dynamic but a little left of center and with DIFFERENT but equally compelling baggage

🦦 omegakirk

not everything is a 50k coffeeshop au if imp wants to write complicated characters and relationships then that’s FINE it doesn’t necessarily reflect how he feels about the character

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

but also sam usually gets some sort of happy ending?? and jim never/rarely does (unless in his porn fics asl;dkfajslfjk then he gets a big happy ending)?? but its never rlly earned and its also usually hella disconnected from the jim story so im just like dude what r u doing here with sam WHY is he in every fic

actually OK i would love to see how imp write a 50k coffee shop au im so curious to see how he’d inject balls to the wall trauma into that genre

🍓 superslice

i agree but like. mix it up! the sam&kirk dynamic is always the same idk man...........

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

he writes some fun/fluff stuff but i feel like it’s always about bones lfjasdkf like he doesn’t think kirk deserves to be happy or have a day off

🐙 starrysulu

oh i DID actually like his bones deserves appreciation fic

ugh fuck u guys ur making me like imp :/

im going to have to go back on a decade of hate reading a;ldskfjaslfkj

🦦 omegakirk

YES join us stars

🍓 superslice

yesssssss join us!!!!!!!

also. like georgietakei is like his BEST friend and i trust her so much so he cannot be that bad.........

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

i’ll move myself to imp tolerant for now

yeah this is the one flaw that georgietakei has

🍓 superslice

ok wait left turn but has anyone read his dr sexy fics..... 👀

NOT THE POINT I WAS TRYING TO MAKE SMH;LKASDJF

🐙 starrysulu

after what he did with women in star trek? no

🍓 superslice

i wasn’t gonna read them but then i thought fuck it i’d read ANYTHING he writes and it was lowkey so

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

good...i’ve never even seen the show

NO HIS DR. KARMA IS SOOOO GOOD

I SWEAR

🦦 omegakirk

ugh i tried but they just didn’t vibe with me even with imp’s writing :((

like...not to truth about imp but isn’t a man watching dr sexy kinda...y’know...

🍓 superslice

WHAT I’M SAYINGGGGGGG

alright well forget you guys STAN IMP’S DR SEXY FICS. the one where dr karma has like. healing powers was honestly so good fr

  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

please OK it’s like the modern day baywatch i bet he watches it for the hot boobs and wouldn’t even be able to explain why dr sexy wears his cowboy boots

🦦 omegakirk

one of his fics is literally TITLED after the cowboy boots don’t say anything if ur not even gonna do ur research

🐙 starrysulu

whatever i don’t have time to go thru his entire archive i may not love the man but even ill admit dude is prolific something is badly wrong with his irl for SURE

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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

yes OK i was just abt to say this he has an ENTIRE fic about why the boots are so sexy that’s like. not explicitly gay but comes off pretty gay flasgljafkdgkgk

oh no his rl is def fucked up for sure

🐙 starrysulu

a;lsdjfalfkj u guys are gonna get fandom cancelled AGAIN for [gunshots] truthing about imp

🦦 omegakirk

maybe the dude is just creative??? like looking at his fics there’s no way ALL THIS stuff has happened to him in some way or another that would be some kind of cosmic joke

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

also like he DOES identify as straight so if he doesn’t want to stand w pride w this community i dont want to give him the representation points yk? like everyone is on their own identity journey but im not about to give a cis white man points for something he hasn’t/isn’t AND it doesn’t mean that his dedication to unhappy endings doesn’t harm queer people who see that he’s like the BIGGEST author of the BIGGEST slash pairing you know?

🍓 superslice

it’s all sci fi OBV it didn’t all happen to him but dude clearly has some sort of daddy issues

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

srry i know the truthing stuff is mostly a joke (even if people take it too far) but who would i be if i wasn’t buzzkilling fandom jokes L O L

lmao someone should dm him you know fic isn’t therapy right

🍓 superslice

ok yea i will respect how he identifies sorry but also he told keepontrekkin (rip you will be missed we’re tf did they go???) that in 2009 so who knows what is going on since then lord knows i didn’t know i was gay in 2009 asdjkfjlk. also wait do we know for sure he’s white? i mean prob but has he said that?

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

but yea agree about the unhappy ending being harmful sometimes but there IS other happy fic out there for ppl to read idk maybe i’m bending over backwards but i just love his fic

🐙 starrysulu

true true i think i’m just a hater because i think he’s overhyped like he’s good but not THAT good

also yeah rip to keepontrekkin

🍓 superslice

someone SHOULD a;sldkfkadf i would DIE

basically my take is i DO acknowledge like why his fics can be problematic but i’ll still read every single one LMAO

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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

ur one flaw :/

🍓 superslice

and it’s not like he’s trying to be like a voice for the queer community or inserting himself into that space outside of his fic like trekkin told me imp literally said it would be gauche of him to participate bc he’s straight so like at least he knows his lane ya know?

🐙 starrysulu

oh imp said that?

that’s actually pretty cool of him

damnit slice STOP making me into an imp apologist

  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🍓 superslice

that’s what trekkin told me!! so like respect for that and like again he has the georgietakei vote so i’m gonna give him the benefit of the doubt ESP if he’s telling the truth abt the sailor moon fic not being his. the world will never know

🐙 starrysulu

you know what? georgietakei’s stance on schrodinger’s sailor moon fic is DEAFENING

if she said he didn’t write it id believe her

🍓 superslice

god and she’s prob be the only one who would know for sure......................talk about keys to the kingdom

  
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🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

🐙 starrysulu

i mean tho obvi imo he did write it he’s just embarrassed bc its bad and super problematic a;lkfslakfj its pretty similar to his early kirk/sexy lamp fic around that time

🦦 omegakirk

guys i have a plan what if I flirt with georgie for intel (DEF not any other reason)

🐙 starrysulu

XD

150k, identity porn, enemies to lovers DO IT!!

🍓 superslice

yea honestly the simplest answer is usually the right one. like he wasn’t even

➖↗️❌

🟢 omegakirk, starrysulu, superslice

📹📞👤➕

guys i have a plan what if I flirt with georgie for intel (DEF not any other reason)

🐙 starrysulu

XD

150k, identity porn, enemies to lovers DO IT!!

🍓 superslice

yea honestly the simplest answer is usually the right one. like he wasn’t even going to transfer his OFC fics over to ff he only did bc of a request so . clearly he’s trying to leave that whole era behind

now THIS is the longfic with a happy ending imp needs to write

🦦 omegakirk

XD

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is [here](https://8daysuntiltheapocalypseiguess.tumblr.com/) if you want to visit! I’d love to hear from you about SPN or Star Trek or anything really!


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